2022 April Fools NFL Mock Draft



Last update: Friday, April 1, 2022. Major changes in all 1 rounds.
Next update: Every week.
Follow me @walterfootball for updates.


  1. Jacksonville Jaguars: Real Trevor Lawrence, QB, Clemson
    Trevor Lawrence was supposed to help the Jaguars contend for a playoff spot this past season. That did not happen. Instead, Lawrence struggled, as Jacksonville finished with the worst record in the NFL. Everyone was confused as to why this was the case, but owner Shad Khan discovered the ugly truth recently.

    "I was having breakfast with Trevor one morning, and I expected him to compliment me on my handsome mustache," Khan said. "Instead, Trevor repeated the same thing over and over again, and then he collapsed. I checked to see if he was OK, and I discovered a "Made in China" sticker on the back of his neck. It turns out that this Trevor was a cheap knockoff of the original."

    As it turns out, the real Lawrence was placed into a Chinese concentration camp so that Chairman Xi Jinping could sell cheap facsimiles.

    "Oh, bother, I feel a rumbly in my tummy," Chairman Xi asked when pressed about Lawrence's imprisonment.

    Meanwhile, Urban Meyer was not surprised.

    "Being NFL coach totally sucked," Meyer spat. "Not only did I get a cheap knockoff at quarterback; people also complained when I abandoned my team to grind with hot chicks at the bar. No one would've ever complained about this at Ohio State."

    The Jaguars, naturally, will rectify last year's pick by selecting the real Lawrence. Perhaps he'll be able to lead Jacksonville into the postseason after all.


  2. Kansas City Chiefs: Kayvon Thibodeaux, DE/OLB, Oregon
    The Lions have decided to utilize a new strategy. Rather than win a Super Bowl themselves, they will attempt to help other teams win the big game.

    "We traded away Matthew Stafford to the Rams last offseason, and the Rams ended up winning the Super Bowl, so it's like we won vicariously through them," said head coach Dan Campbell.

    Campbell's plan this time is to give the Chiefs a Super Bowl LVII victory. The Lions traded away Amon-Ra St. Brown and the No. 2 overall pick in the 2022 NFL Draft for the right to call themselves the Detroit Chiefs upon Kansas City's Super Bowl win.

    "We're really excited and motivated to be the Detroit Chiefs," Campbell beamed. "Being the Detroit Rams in February of this past season was a major motivational factor for our guys. Now, we get to re-live the magic again this year."

  3. Houston Texans: Art Shell, HC, Maryland Eastern Shore
    The Texans were expected to obtain an edge rusher with this pick. Instead, they've settled on a new head coach despite hiring one in January. That new coach was Lovie Smith, but the Texans have announced that they've fired him already.

    "The only thing we love more than hiring black head coaches is firing black head coaches," said owner Cal McNair. "We can't have the inmates running the prison, after all."

    Reports indicate that the Texans were smitten with one particular feature of Shell's.

    "Have you seen his mutton chops?" McNair asked. "We fell in love with Lovie's beard, but I am head over heels for Art's mutton chops!"



  4. Seattle Seahawks: Aidan Hutchinson, DE, Michigan
    The Jets went into the draft thinking they had two picks in the top 10 selections. That turned out not to be the case.

    "I've removed the Jets' first pick and given it to the Seahawks because they've defied the morality clause," Roger Goodell said coldly.

    What morality clause? After doing some digging, reporters unearthed an e-mail Goodell sent to the owners.

    "I saw one of Robert Saleh's e-mails, and he called me a farter!" Goodell whined. "I'm totally not a farter, you guys. And to prove it, I'm going to banish one of the Jets' picks because their coach called me a farter. That'll totally make everyone believe I'm not a farter. I would never fart, nope, not one single time, except maybe if the fart smelled nice and would feel good leaving my buttocks, but nope, definitely not a farter, and this proves it!"

  5. New York Giants: Kenny Golladay, WR, Northern Illinois
    When the Giants hired Joe Schoen to be their new general manager, fans believed that the team would finally be headed in the right direction. Dave Gettleman, after all, put the team in such dire cap purgatory that the franchise was eight figures in the red despite having Daniel Jones and Saquon Barkley signed to rookie deals.

    You can imagine how deflated the Giants fans were when they learned Gettleman never departed.

    "There was no Joe Schoen this entire time, for it is I, Dave Gettleman, who was wearing a Joe Schoen disguise!" roared Gettleman, who was still wearing a mask over his nose and mouth for some reason while tearing himself out of the Joe Schoen costume. "To prove how great of a general manager I am, I'm going to spend this draft pick on Kenny Golladay and give him $72 million on top of the original $72 million I gave him last spring, which will prove how great of a general manager I am!"

    We're not clear how this proves Gettleman is capable of doing his job, but it's clear that the Giants won't be winning many games anytime soon.



  6. Carolina Panthers: Beyonce, QB, Houston
    When Matt Rhule announced that he was the Jay-Z of NFL head coaches, no one really took him seriously. Besides, he's been more Silkk the Shocker than Jay-Z, based on his performance in Carolina thus far.

    Rhule, however, has taken his rapping coaching career a bit too far.

    "I'm a coach with no quarterback, uhh, which is why my team always get shellack, uhh, so I found someone who can lead my team, uhh, who can carry the Panthers to that ultimate dream, uhh," Rhule rapped.

    That "someone" is Beyonce, who will be quarterbacking the Panthers in 2022. We were skeptical at first, but then we remembered that Sam Darnold and Cam Newton quarterbacked the Panthers in 2021, and Beyonce can't possibly be worse than either.

  7. New York Giants: Leonard Williams, DT, USC
    The Giants are lucky that Gettleman is actually making this pick.

    "I almost passed out from all the carbon dioxide I'm inhaling as a result of this super important mask that will totally keep me safe even though every box of masks says it won't prevent you from getting Covid," Gettleman announced.

    The pick is in, and unfortunately, it's another Gettleman rerun.

    "Leonard Williams was a very impressive signing by me, if I do say so myself," Gettleman snorted, inhaling more bacteria on his precious mask. "In fact, I'm giving Leonard Williams $63 million on top of the original $63 million I originally gave him. Super Bowl, here we come!"



  8. Atlanta Falcons: Pete Rose, 3B, Reds
    Calvin Ridley has been suspended for gambling on football. Rather than distance themselves from Ridley, the Falcons have opted to embrace it.

    "We're drafting Pete Rose to give Calvin tips on how to bet on his own sport," head coach Arthur Smith said.

    Smith noted that he was worried about Ridley's gambling problem, and that Rose was the only one who could help.

    "Calvin said he was placing bets on FanDuel," Smith said. "This is horrible. Everyone knows there are far superior sportsbooks out there. The fact that Calvin didn't know about this is quite troubling."

  9. Denver Broncos: Drew Lock, QB, Missouri
    You have to feel sorry for the Broncos. They believed they were Super Bowl contenders once they traded for Russell Wilson. It turns out that the deal was negated because of Drew Lock.

    "Sorry guys, I have a no-trade clause, and I'm going to exercise it," Lock said.

    Lock has received angry letters from disgruntled Broncos fans. Some even contained death threats. This didn't bother Lock at all.

    "When you're a great quarterback in the NFL, it comes with the territory," Lock said. "I hear boos all the time. This is because I'm so great."



  10. New York Jets: Jimmy Clausen, QB, Notre Dame
    The Jets spent a draft pick last year on acquiring a veteran quarterback who could help mentor Zach Wilson. Unfortunately for them, Joe Flacco didn't have quite the impact they expected. Thus, New York has opted to go in a different direction with their remaining first-round pick.

    "Ordinary Joe doesn't understand Zach's plight," noted general manager Joe Douglas. "This is where Jimmy comes in. He'll be able to teach Zach the rigors of the NFL better than anyone."

    When Jimmy Clausen and Wilson watched some tape together during a pre-draft visit, Wilson reportedly had numerous questions for the former Notre Dame star.

    "Sir James Clausen, when I venture into a huddle with my teammates, I have noticed that there is never any caviar readily available for my consumption," Wilson said to Clausen. "My dearest nuncle, JetBlue Wilson, always has emergency caviar at the ready in his humble abode."

    "Ah yes, dearest Zachary, you must understand that as a player in the National Football League, you will be surrounded by the poors," Clausen explained. "These commoners do not understand that those as refined as ourselves must consume caviar for our daily regimen."

    Clausen will reportedly be teaching dearest Zachary about how to squeeze in a game of polo during training camp, and how he can best introduce the poors to daily afternoon tea to bridge light lunches and late dinners.

  11. Washington Blueskins: Name Change (Again)
    The Redskins have undergone multiple name changes in the past couple of years. Placating to those deeply offended by the name "Redskins" - namely white saviors on Twitter - they changed their name to the Washington Football Team. They then decided on Commanders, which seemed to appease everyone, save for the Native American community, as members of that race pointed out that the Washington franchise removed a Native American imagery in favor of a group that conquered Native Americans.

    Per usual, the blue-check white saviors on Twitter were outraged.

    "I'm so angry right now, I'm going to go to Starbucks and order a $40 triple double coffee frappe latte mocha cocoa mojito with quadruple shots of espresso," a blue-check white savior with rich parents said. "I can't believe these Native Americans. Two polls show that 90 percent of them support the name 'Redskins.' This is a classic example of white privilege. If only they would listen to me. I went to college for a liberal arts degree and now have $60,000 in debt that hopefully someone else will pay. I know better than them!"

    Daniel Snyder opted to change the name again, choosing Blueskins because he read the WalterFootball.com 2021 April Fools' Day mock draft.

    "It's the only thing that won't offend anyone," Snyder said. "We can't possibly offend the 50 loud people on Twitter because then our sponsorships will be canceled. What will we do if FedEx doesn't advertise with us? It's not like there are millions of other companies that would be interested in sponsoring a professional football franchise. If only other companies besides FedEx existed!"

  12. Minnesota Vikings: Dave Gettleman, GM, St. Thomas
    Giants fans, your nightmare is over. Dave Gettleman is no longer the general manager of your team. This is because the Vikings drafted him away from New York.

    "But I'm not done ruining things here yet!" the masked Gettleman cried as he was being escorted out of the building.

    Vikings owner Zygi Wilf was most interested in Gettleman as a way to win in the long term.

    "The previous regime made the mistake of overpaying mediocre players like Kirk Cousins, which put us in purgatory," Wilf said while admiring his mustache in the mirror. "The correct course of action would have been to overpay terrible and injury-prone players so that we could end up with one of the top picks in the draft. I'm hoping that with David running the show, we can finally land the No. 1 pick one of these years."

  13. Cleveland Browns: Drew Lock, QB, Missouri
    Drew Lock has exercised his no-trade clause once again, blocking Deshaun Watson from going to the Browns. Cleveland obtained its original draft choice.

    And yet, that wasn't the worst of it.

    "I've exercised my forced-trade clause and moved myself to the Browns," Lock announced. "Everyone on Cleveland will love me because I'm a great quarterback, so I expect lots of boos, which will only prove how great I am."

  14. Baltimore Ravens: Derek Stingley, CB, LSU
    The Ravens had a long history of drafting Alabama players under Ozzie Newsome, but have switched to LSU prospects under Eric DeCosta's leadership. This seems to be a great selection, given the prospect and the need, but that didn't concern DeCosta at all.

    "One day, Oswald Newsome will learn what a fool he was to draft all of those miserable Alabama athletes," DeCoasta sneered. "By obtaining LSU players, it'll give me the best chance to prove Newsome wrong and make him look like an utter imbecile."

    When asked why DeCosta despises Newsome so much, he wouldn't answer, but sources say that DeCoasta has harbored negative feelings for Newsome ever since Newsome ate the last of the gummi bears DeCoasta had in his desk. Newsome defended himself amid the allegations.

    "As a wise man once said, finders keepers, losers weepers," Newsome said coldly.

  15. Philadelphia Eagles: Spencer Rattler, QB, Oklahoma
    Howie Roseman is known for making some great draft trades. His draft selections, on the other hand, have been rather puzzling. No one understood the Jalen Hurts pick that occurred right after Roseman gave Carson Wentz a big contract. Now, Roseman has decided to take another Oklahoma quarterback.

    "We need to take a look at another quarterback," Roseman said. "Don't worry, we're not replacing Jalen as the starter. Why would we spend an early draft choice on a new quarterback? Teams spend early picks on quarterbacks these days to have a look at them. Consider the Packers and Jordan Love, for example. Besides we have so many first-round picks that..."

    Roseman trailed off and suddenly was lost in a trance...

  16. Philadelphia Eagles: Pick Forfeited
    Howie Roseman retreated to his office and issued a statement:

    Dear Eagles fans,

    I bear such a heavy weight on my conscience today. I've come to the sudden realization that I am not a good person. For years, I have fleeced incompetent general managers of their draft capital, which is the case in this instance when I traded damaged goods in return for a first-round selection. I will not be able to live with myself any longer if I continue to take advantage of the incompetence of my general manager brethren. Therefore, I will be forfeiting the remaining two draft choices. I understand that some Eagles fans will not be pleased with this, but doing so will allow me to sleep easier at night. Much like you should avoid trading a shiny penny to the slow child at the playground for his bag of Cheetos, I will no longer be ridiculing the incompetent general managers in the NFL. I hope all of you will understand one day.

    Sincerely yours,

    Howie Roseman



  17. Go to 2022 April Fools NFL Mock Draft: Picks 17-32

    Sorry for cutting this into two halves; I've received complaints about load times and putting the mock draft on two pages saves bandwidth.

Real 2022 NFL Mock Draft





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2022 NBA Mock Draft - June 23


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2014 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATE 5/8): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2014 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/10): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2014 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (5/8) /Goals (5/3) /Not Mock (4/27) /Emmitt Mock (4/20) /Trades Mock (4/13) /Celebrity Mock (4/11) /Backward Mock (4/4) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/6) /Overreaction Mock (12/30)
2015 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2015 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/2): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2015 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/30) /Goals (4/25) /Not Mock (4/19) /Emmitt Mock (4/17) /Trades Mock (4/12) /Celebrity Mock (4/10) /Backward Mock (4/3) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/5) /Overreaction Mock (12/29)
2016 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2016 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2016 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/28) /Combo (5/8) /Goals (4/23) /Not Mock (4/22) /Emmitt Mock (4/17) /Trades Mock (4/16) /Celebrity Mock (4/10) /Backward Mock (4/7) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/6) /Overreaction Mock (1/4)
2017 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/27): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2017 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/29): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
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2018 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/26): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2018 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2018 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/26) /Combo (5/6) /Goals (4/21) /Not Mock (4/20) /Emmitt Mock (4/15) /Trades Mock (4/13) /Backward Mock (4/8) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/11) /Senior Bowl (1/27)
2019 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/25): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2019 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/27): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2019 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/25) /Combo (5/5) /Goals (4/20) /Not Mock (4/18) /Witten Mock (4/14) /Trades Mock (4/12) /Emmitt Mock (4/7) /Backward Mock (4/5) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/10) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/26) /Video Mock (1/8) /Overreaction Mock (12/31)
2020 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/23): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2020 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/25): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2020 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/23) /Combo (5/3) /Goals (4/18) /Emmitt Mock (4/12) /Trades Mock (4/8) /Backward Mock (4/5) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/16) /Corey Long (3/13) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/27) /Overreaction Mock (12/30)
2021 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/29): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2021 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/1): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2021 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (5/17) /Goals (4/23) /Backward Mock (4/18) /Emmitt Mock (4/11) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/30) /Overreaction Mock (1/4)
2022 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2022 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2022 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/28) /Goals (4/22) /Backward Mock (4/20) /Emmitt Mock (4/15) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Senior Bowl Mock (2/5) /Overreaction Mock (1/10)
2023 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 6/21): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2
Other 2023 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (6/20)
2024 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 3/4): Round 1 /Picks 17-32
2016 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2015 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2014 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2013 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2012 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2011 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2010 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2009 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2008 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2007 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2006 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2005 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2004 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2003 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2002 NFL Draft Re-Mock


 





 

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