Real 2022 NFL Mock Draft
Jacksonville Jaguars: Spencer Riddler, QB, Cincinnati
Everybody say that Mel Cooper the best NFL Draft on USPN. Mel Cooper say the other day that Lawrence Taylor do a horrible job of quarterback on the Jaguar. He throw a lot of intersections and make a lot of bad intersections as well. This not a good formula for winned games. In fax, it is the recipe for lossed. Todd McShame agreement.
It is time for the Jaguar to try another quarterback because Lawrence Taylor are the biggest draft bus of all times, and time the thing happen to be on the clock, and when the clock strike midnight, it is 2 o'clock. Spencer Riddler look good in the college football playoff when he throw a lot of pass and ask a lot of question, and if he throw a lot of pass on the Jaguar, he definitely gonna go to the doggone playoff unlike he do under Lawrence Taylor quarterback job.
Detroit Lions: Ivan Neal, OT, Alabama
The Lion and the Bengal are the same species in the city of Africa jungles, so it come as no surprise that they both has similar decision to make in the draft. Last year, the Bengal make a choice to draft Ja'Marr Choose over Penei Pasta, and they choosed the wrong guy. Penei Pasta retirement because he embarrass that he go after Ja'Marr Choose, so now it are time for the Lion to make the same decision, pick or draft a linemen who can protect Matthew Stanford.
Ivan Neal remind me of a guy from Russian because his name the same as Ivan Dragon, the guy who fight Rocky Baloney in the movie I cannot remember what the movie call, but it about boxing and then Rocky Baloney yell Adrienne because that is the name of Rocky girlfriend, but I cannot recall what the movie call for the life of me's.
Houston Texans: Treylon Bricks, WR, Arkansas
Deshaun Wilkins do not play in the year of 2021 because he got suspension because he and Robert Kraft have sexual with stripper. While this not prove in court yet, this a very serious execution that everybody have to take seriously because stripper a honest profession like teacher, accountment, or toaster.
It probably a good idea to give Deshaun Wilkins a receiver because he need all the help he can give. The Texan just trade Andre Johnson to the Cardinal for Adrian Forster, so he no longer have any receiver on his team.
New York Jets: Ikeman Ekwangman, OT, N.C. State
Zach Wilkins play great on his rookie year. I only watch him when he beat the Tennessee Titan in overtime that one game, but if he play half as good as he play versus the Titan, then he on his way to be enshined in the Hall of Flame like myselfs, Troy Aiken, Michael Irving, Moose Johnson and Wayne Newton, all who use to play for the Cowboy a long time ago. If he play half as good, he play almost 100 percent as good.
The only thing the Jet missing are offensive lineman even though he draft two in the last two month of the draft. The last time I check, you need more than two offensive line to block good because there five starting offensive lineman. That mean the Jet need two minus five lineman according to my calculator, which the answer negative-3, so the Jet need negative-3 new lineman before he finally good again.
New York Giants: Malik Williams, QB, Liberty
Daniel Johnson play good, but it is time for him to become retirement. As they say, he long in the mouth, so he probably gonna go riding off into the sunrise. This mean the Giant need a new quarterback after so many good year of Daniel Johnson and Eli Johnson.
Malik Williams probably the next great quarterback. He probably going to be the first quarterback taken, unless he the second quarterback taken, in which case he probably going to be the two quarterback taken unless he the three quarterback taken.
Carolina Panthers: Trent McDuffie, CB, Washington
The Panther draft a lot of cornerback and he also trade for a lot of cornerback, and yet no matter how hard he try, he cannot stop the past. But as the old saying go, if at first you don't success, try to has success one more times.
Perhaps Trent McDuffie going to be the guy who cure all the Panther woes. I try to do research to see if he the son of the former great football player O.J. McDuffie, but I go to the library and he do not have any book on these. Somebody should invention a gizmo you can used to do research real quick instead of spend hour in the library because I spent five day in the library searching for a book that do not exist!
New York Giants: Jameson Wilkins, WR, Alabama
Daniel Johnson a great quarterback, and he only need one more player to get him over the hunk. If that player a receiver, running back or offensive line, it make no different because the hunk so close and he just gotta get over it to the other side.
Jameson Wilkins probably gonna be the guy the Giant draft to help Jameson Johnson finally become a good quarterback. Jameson Jones so good that he have a great performance in the national championship when Alabama beat Georgia State.
Atlanta Falcons: Dameon Price, RB, Florida
I go far too long without giving a team a running back. That team the Falcon, who so desperate for a running back that he use Cordarrelle Peterson at running back last month in the month of 2021. This mean the Falcon have no running back, and as the old saying go, a team without a running back are like a dessert without sand. If a dessert do not have sand, then he just a place with a real ground but not one with sand like dessert or beach.
Dameon Price from my almond mater, Florida State. I remember the good time at Florida State, even when they force me to go to class. The hardest test I have in college are when they ask me "What sound do cow make?" I choose "quack quack" and I got the answer wronged, but the teacher a big football fan, so he give me A+ instead of F because he do not want to see me fail so he seek justice.
Denver Broncos: Desmond Riddler, QB, Oklahoma
Peyton Manning and Alvin Manning the last two brother who play in the National League of Football. Now, it is time for another brother and brother to take the league by storms unless they happen to be father and son. Spencer Riddler the first pick in this draft, and now his brother or son or father Desmond Riddler go to the Bronco. The last time the Bronco made the doggone playoff, Peyton Manning was the quarterback, so this is what you call an ironic. That happen to be one of my favorite song by Atlantis Morsette.
New York Jets: Derek Stingray, CB, LSU
The Jet already has a great quarterback in place, so now he need defenses, and when I say defenses, I mean a lot of defenses. They need lots of defenses, which mean the highest number anyone can ever count up to, which probably the number 100 because no one know what come next after 100.
I glad to see Stingray on the board to be draft. In my favorite TV show, Cobra Kid, Stingray a real fat guy who got beatened up when he try to join the karate club. Now, he losted all his fat and he try to join the football club, and he probably not gonna get beatened up.
Washington Redskins: Sam Howl, QB, North Carolina
I heard the news that the Redskin change his name to the Contenders, but I am old school so I am going to stick with the name given to him when he borned. But irregardless of whether or not you call him the Redskin or the Contender, it is clear that he have a real quarterback problem. They has a guy name Heineken start at quarterback for them last year, and he play like he drink a lot of Heineken. This is a joke meaning that Heineken the quarterback got drunked because he drink a lot of Heineken the beer.
I real impress with Sam Howl, the quarterback from the city of North Carolina. I never seened him play because my TV broked, but his name project strongness. I remember learn from class at Florida State that howl are the thing the moon do when they see the wolf, and this project a lot of strength and good throw from the new quarterback of dare I say the Redskin.
Minnesota Vikings: Kabir Elam, CB, Florida
The Viking make a big missed steak by firing Mike Zimmerman. He a great coach, just like Norv Turner and Jimmy Jones. Mark my warts, the Viking gonna rule the day he fire the class axe known as Mike Zimmerman.
For those of you who are ignorance, Mike Zimmerman do a lot of great work with cornerback. This is a position that cover the receiver and do other thing. The Viking need another cornerback to compensatory for Zimmerman firing, so why not draft Kabir Elam, who the son of Jason Elam, the great kicker for the Bronco? Kaiir Elam can play cornerback and he probably can play kicker if the Viking in a pickle or a cucumbous.
Cleveland Browns: Brock Pretty, QB, Iowa State
I haved it up to my last nerd with Baker Makerfield. I thought he was the best quarterback in the National Football of Football, so I spented my first pick in my fantastic draft on him. He ended up being terrible pick. I losted every fantastic game but part of the problem was that I never suit my lineup. When they telled me I losted because I never suit my lineup, I ask, "How do I suit my lineup?" everyone in the league laugh at me and they give me a suit present for finish in last place. They all laugh to begin, but I has the last laugh because I got a free suit.
Before I talk about how Sam Howl have a strong name for football because the moon bark over the cow. Brock Pretty the opposide of this. Brock Pretty make him sound like he, I forget the word, it mean beautiful but begin with the number P. This why he draft after Sam Howl. But this might be a good thing because the defense probably gonna misunderestimate him.
Baltimore Ravens: Chris Cross, OT, Mississippi State
Lamar Jaskins always running for his lives, so it is ashame that he not a cat. Because when a cat die, he comed back to alife. This because cat have 12 life. Lamar Jaskins only have one life, or maybe two if he lucky.
The Raven need to give Lamar Jaskin all the protect he need to has the best chance of play good. Chris Cross was one of my favorite rapper, and now he make the jump to football. If I has to make a power ranking of all my favorite rapper, Chris Cross number one, then Biggie Smells, then TwoPack.
Philadelphia Eagles: Bernard Rainman, OT, Central Michigan
Jalen Harms play real good last year, but people always criticism him for the slightest missed steak. I'm sure he always feel sub conscious. He need extra protect up front because Jason Peterman retiremented.
As it so happen, Bernard Rainman remind me of Jason Peterman. This because they both play the same position. Irregardless, Rainman gonna help Jalen Harms who right now feel like he bringing a gun to a knife fight because he do not has the protect.
Philadelphia Eagles: Bernard Rainman, OT, Central Michigan
I does not know why the Eagle have two pick in a road. This how it list on the draft order sheet I order from Amazon for $19.99 back in January, but it comed with free shipmenting, so it was a great deal. Or so I think because now it have a missed steak. How can a team have two pick in a road in draft? This is unpossible. So I constipated for this error by giving the Rainman to the Eagle again for the second times in a road.
Go to Emmitt Smith's 2022 NFL Mock Draft: Picks 17-32
Sorry for cutting this into two halves; I've received complaints about load times and putting the mock draft on two pages saves bandwidth.
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