Humor

Jerk of the Week: The Father-Son Water Problem I’ve had a few multi-episode segments in Jerks of the Week over the years. I’ve written multiple posts on my trips down the shore or to Las Vegas. Last year’s Las Vegas saga lasted a mind-boggling 12 entries. All of these multi-part entries have been planned. I…

Jerk of the Week: Preschool Graduation Before I had kids, I’d sometimes hear parents say something like, “The big day’s coming up! We have our son’s preschool graduation soon!” I’d hear this and think, “My God, you’re such a loser. Who the f**k cares about preschool graduation? It’s literally the easiest thing ever because all…

Jerk of the Week: What Do We Do When Times Are Tough? There’s an old saying that goes, “Kids say the darndest things.” I don’t know where this saying originated from, or who even said it in the first place. I suppose I could look it up on the same laptop I’m typing this Jerks…

Jerk of the Week: Finally an X-Ray!? This is Part 3 of my ankle X-ray saga. Here are links to Part 1 and Part 2. If you don’t feel like clicking those links, here’s a rundown of what transpired to lead me on a 3-month journey to procure an X-ray on my ankle: I sprained…

Jerk of the Week: Is Burger King the New King? I’ve ranted about fast food restaurants many times throughout my Jerks of the Week entries in recent years. It’s been several months since I’ve done so, however, so allow me to do it again. A fun part of my childhood was going with my mom…

Jerk of the Week: Shrinkflation at Red Lobster Some people collect baseball cards when they are kids. Others collect action figures or Barbies. Some collect stuffed animals, comic books, or Pogs. Remember Pogs? And then, there are some kids who collect crab legs. Yes, crab legs. If you don’t believe me, you’re reading the words…

Jerk of the Week: Party in the Woods Fifteen years ago, a Jerks of the Week entry entitled “Party in the Woods” would have meant something completely different for me. My friends and I used to party quite often in those days, so much so that some Jerks of the Week readers told me that…

Jerk of the Week: The Elusive Ankle X-Ray I constantly joke about how obese I am in these Jerks of the Week entries, but the truth of the matter is that I haven’t been super fat most of the time. I’ve joked about it in self-deprecating fashion because I used to be extremely fit when…

Jerk of the Week: The Samauri and the Auctioneer If you don’t have kids, you may not know that they get extremely moody and whiney sometimes. And I’m not even referring to teenagers who think their parents are spawns of Satan after being grounded for the weekend. My kids, Conrad and Lilly, are four and…

Jerk of the Week: The Whacky Pizza Party Someone once told me that they lived vicariously through my Jerks of the Week tales. Of course, this was long ago when I used to frequent bars with my friends. I was in my late 20s back then, and I lived within walking distance of my local…