2024 April Fools NFL Mock Draft

Jason Witten
Last update: Last update: Sunday, March 31, 2024. Major changes in all 1 rounds.
Next update: Every week.
Follow me @walterfootball for updates.


  1. Carolina Panthers Carolina Panthers: J.J. McCarthy, QB, Michigan Michigan
    Bears general manager Ryan Poles couldn’t sleep at night.

    “I felt so bad taking advantage of someone with special needs,” he admitted.

    The man with special needs he’s referring to is none other than Panthers owner David “Axe” Tepper. Poles felt bad for stealing so many resources from Tepper last year that he decided to give it all back, including the No. 1 pick.

    “Haha me have top pick again and all coach say me need to draft Caleb Williams, but me smart and me think J.J. McMarty bestest quarterback on draft, so me going to t- HEY HEY HEY, FANS MAKE ME ANGRY ME GONNA SPILL DRINK ON THEM AND SO THEY NEVER GONNA ANGRY ME AGAIN!”

  2. Washington Redskins Washington Redskins: Matt Ryan, QB, Boston College Boston College
    The Redskins appeared to be having a great offseason. They made some seemingly wise signings, which was not how they operated under Daniel Snyder. It was all a ruse, however.

    “I had you all fooled!” Snyder cackled, as he revealed himself to the media. You thought there was a competent owner in charge of the team. No way, Jose. I’ve always been here, but I tricked you all by making smart decisions in free agency.”

    It’s not clear what Snyder’s plan was beyond deception.

    “I’m back, baby, and I’m going to add washed-up, overpriced veterans like there’s no tomorrow,” Snyder snorted. “First up, we’re going to use this draft pick on Matt Ryan and give him a fully guaranteed $350 million contract. He was good in the past, which means he’ll be good for us!”

  3. New England Patriots New England Patriots: Jason Sehorn Jr., CB, USC USC
    Everyone assumed the Patriots would grab Caleb Williams at No. 3 overall. Instead, New England settled for a cornerback, shocking everyone.

    “As you all know, diversity is our strength,” said new head coach Jerod Mayo. “Many people took this to assume that we would be drafting nothing but black players, but this was a foolish notion. We took a look at race among positions in the NFL, and we came to learn that cornerback was 100-percent black. Because diversity is our strength, we needed to make sure that we would tip the scales and draft a white cornerback.”

    Bruce Arians, Czar of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, was irate about New England’s actions.

    “No, no, no, diversity doesn’t mean adding white people when there are none,” Arians barked. “Diversity means no white people! I put together the most diverse coaching staff in the NFL when I left the coaching ranks of the Buccaneers. Every coach was black. You don’t get more diverse than that!”

  4. Arizona Cardinals Arizona Cardinals: Malik Nabers, WR, LSU LSU
    The Cardinals have been linked to Marvin Harrison Jr. this entire time, but things changed.

    “We didn’t see Marvin Harrison Jr. run a 40, so we were greatly concerned,” said general manager Monti Ossenfort. “Because we didn’t see the 40 times and the jumping stats, we’re going to ignore everything we saw on film and draft another receiver instead.”

  5. Los Angeles Chargers Los Angeles Chargers: Marvin Harrison Jr., WR, Ohio State Ohio State
    Keenan Allen and Mike Williams are gone, but the Chargers were ready to move on with a healthier receiver.

    “I can’t wait to have our top receiver on the field for 16 games for the first time,” said owner Dean Spanos.

    Marvin Harrison Jr. walked to greet his new boss, but tripped up the stairs to the podium and tore his ACL, MCL, PCL, LCL, WCL, XCL, and ZCL. He will be out four years.

    “Man, things haven’t been going our way, injury-wise, since I urinated on that Indian burial ground several years ago,” Spanos said. “Do you think that has something to do with our bad luck?”

  6. New York Giants New York Giants: J.J. McCarthy, QB, Michigan Michigan
    The Giants have never reached for a quarterback prospect at No. 6, so taking a chance on J.J. McCarthy at this spot is a great idea.

  7. Las Vegas Raiders Las Vegas Raiders: Caleb Williams, QB, USC USC
    The Titans have traded this pick to the Raiders, who quickly snatched Caleb Williams off the board. In return, Tennessee received No. 13 overall and wideout Hunter Renfrow, who was part of a sign-and-trade deal.

    “As a Super Bowl contender, we are in the business of trading high draft picks for veteran players,” general manager Ran Carthon declared.

    One reporter tried to ask Carthon why he thought his team was a Super Bowl contender, but Carthon interrupted him.

    “Hush!” Carthon spat. “Your questions are as useless to me as our draft picks.”

  8. Atlanta Falcons Atlanta Falcons: Pat Garwo, RB, Boston College Boston College
    The Falcons are the first team to use consecutive first-round picks on running backs since the turn of the century. Why would they do this? And who is Pat Garwo, exactly?

    “I found Pat Garwo at the bottom of WalterFootball’s running back rankings,” said Zac Robinson, who was suddenly sporting a mustache that looked like it was from another galaxy. “We don’t care how much better Bijan Robinson is better than this Garwo guy; we’re going to feed Garwo the ball until he drops dead, and then we’ll feed Allgeier, and maybe we’ll give Bijan a carry or two.”

    Condolences are in order if you’re a Robinson dynasty owner.

  9. Carolina Panthers Carolina Panthers: J.J. McCarthy, QB, Michigan Michigan
    Ryan Poles better win the Walter Payton Man of the Year Award because he donated his other first-round pick to the Panthers as well.

    “I just feel so bad for poor David,” Poles said. “He’s trying so hard to be a functional member of society, but everything he does keeps backfiring.”

    Speaking of backfiring, “poor” David Tepper used his new selection on the same player.

    “Coaches now tell me we need help for new quarterback, but me need to make sure we have new quarterback,” Tepper said. “If me spend double pick on player me definitely gonna get him and then the player gonna like me a lot because- HEY FANS WHY YOU ANGRY ME AGAIN!? THIS TIME ME GONNA SPILL FRENCH FRIES ON YOU INSTEAD OF DRINKS AND FRENCH FRIES HAVE RED STUFF ON THEM CALLED KETCHUP THAT ME LIKE TO EAT HAHAHAHA!”

  10. Minnesota Vikings Minnesota Vikings: Drake Maye, QB, North Carolina North Carolina
    When the Vikings acquired the Texans’ first-round pick, it was clear that they were accumulating ammo to trade up. Now, we see their grand plan, as they’ve jumped from No. 11 all the way to No. 10.

    “This was a risky move, but I’m glad we did it,” said head coach Kevin O’Connell.

    Thanks to the stupidity of the other teams – namely the Giants and Panthers – the Vikings were able to secure Drake Maye at No. 10, which is a very plausible scenario in real life.

  11. New York Jets New York Jets: Michael Penix Jr., QB, Washington Washington
    The Jets moved back one spot, yet they still secured their man.

    “We’ve been building around Aaron Rodgers so much that we’ve neglected our future,” general manager Joe Douglas said. “And our future is a quarterback who is very young and has no history of injury, unlike Aaron.”

    One of Douglas’ assistants whispered something into his ear. Douglas’ face grew extremely ruddy in an instant.

    “WHAT!?” he shouted. “YOU MEAN THAT PENIX IS OLD AND INJURY-PRONE, LIKE AARON!? WHY DIDN’T SOMEONE TELL ME THIS!?”

  12. Denver Broncos Denver Broncos: No one
    Sean Payton looked depressed when he addressed the media.

    “I quit,” he sobbed. “I just can’t do it anymore.”

    Payton wiped a tear from his eye before continuing.

    “All the quarterbacks I wanted are gone, and even J.J. McCarthy was drafted three times already,” Payton lamented. “I don’t want this Bo Nix trash. I’d rather just not draft anyone and go lay on a beach somewhere because going through another season with crap quarterbacking is not what I signed up for.”

  13. Tennessee Titans Tennessee Titans: J.C. Latham, OT/G, Alabama Alabama
    The Titans were expected to draft Joe Alt at No. 7 overall, but traded back with the Raiders. Shockingly, Alt was still available at No. 13. But even more shockingly, the Titans eschewed Alt in favor of another offensive tackle.

    “I hate Alt!” Carthon spat. “I hate Alt so much that flames, flames on the side of my faces. Heaving breaths, heaving- heaving breaths.”

    Carthon hyperventilated for several minutes. After he calmed down, a reporter asked him why he hated the Notre Dame tackle so much.

    “Because he reminds me of the Alt button on the computer!” Carthon shrieked. “It doesn’t do anything! Has anyone ever tried pushing it? Look, I’m doing it now on my laptop! Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Alt doesn’t do anything!”

  14. New Orleans Saints New Orleans Saints: Jacob Cowing, WR, Arizona Arizona
    It’s not really a surprise that the Saints drafted a receiver at No. 14 with Michael Thomas gone, but Jacob Cowing? Why him, with so many other talented receivers available? Cowing is projected to be a fourth-round pick.

    “Could we have drafted a better receiver? Sure,” general manager Mickey Loomis answered his own question. “But that goes against our goals of being 8-9 or 9-8 every year.”

    Wait, isn’t it New Orleans’ goal to win the Super Bowl?

    “Uh, no,” Loomis said. “Any team can win the Super Bowl. But it’s extremely rare to be part of a team consistently going 8-9 and 9-8 while being stuck in cap purgatory. It’s quite the impressive feat.”

  15. Indianapolis Colts Indianapolis Colts: Jayden Daniels, QB, LSU LSU
    To say that the Colts are jaded with their first-round quarterbacks is an understatement.

    “We draft a quarterback, he gets hurt, and then he retires, and last year, we draft a quarterback, he gets hurt, and he’s probably going to retire just like that Luck guy,” said general manager Chris Ballard. “We need to take matters into our own hands.”

    Those matters apparently mean doubling down on first-round quarterbacks.

    “Yes, that’s exactly right!” Ballard exclaimed. “Now we have two first-round quarterbacks, so when Anthony screws us over and retires, we’ll have another guy who can get injured and then retire early!”

  16. Seattle Seahawks NFL Draft 2024 Seattle Seahawks: Bo Nix, QB, Oregon Oregon
    When the Seahawks said that the quarterback job was up for competition, no one thought that they meant they’d use the 16th-overall pick on the position, yet here we are.

    “We love Bo Nix,” said general manager John Schneider. “He’s got all the traits, including age. He’s been in school for a decade, so what is he, like 33, 34? He reminds me of Pete so much.”

    Schneider suddenly got teary-eyed. He brandished a handkerchief and blew his nose before continuing.

    “Pete may have looked like an aging lesbian, but he always brought the energy despite being 80 years old,” Schneider said. “I’m sad to see him go, but I’m thankful we can have another aging lesbian quarterbacking our team.”


  17. Go to 2024 April Fools NFL Mock Draft: Picks 17-32

    Sorry for cutting this into two halves; I’ve received complaints about load times and putting the mock draft on two pages saves bandwidth.

Real 2024 NFL Mock Draft




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2012 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/26): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
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Other 2012 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/26) /Pick History (4/23) /Emmitt Mock (4/19) /Not Mock (4/19) /Backward Mock (4/17) /Celebrity (4/15) /Goals (4/10) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/6) /Greg Cox (9/9)
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Other 2013 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/25) /GM Mock (4/21) /Charlie's Trade Mock (4/20) /Goals (4/19) /Rapid Reader Mock (4/18) /Emmitt Mock (4/14) /Not Mock (4/13) /Pick History (4/5) /Backward Mock (4/4) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/7) /Archived 2013 NFL Mock Drafts
2014 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATE 5/8): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2014 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/10): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2014 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (5/8) /Goals (5/3) /Not Mock (4/27) /Emmitt Mock (4/20) /Trades Mock (4/13) /Celebrity Mock (4/11) /Backward Mock (4/4) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/6) /Overreaction Mock (12/30)
2015 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2015 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/2): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2015 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/30) /Goals (4/25) /Not Mock (4/19) /Emmitt Mock (4/17) /Trades Mock (4/12) /Celebrity Mock (4/10) /Backward Mock (4/3) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/5) /Overreaction Mock (12/29)
2016 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2016 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2016 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/28) /Combo (5/8) /Goals (4/23) /Not Mock (4/22) /Emmitt Mock (4/17) /Trades Mock (4/16) /Celebrity Mock (4/10) /Backward Mock (4/7) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/6) /Overreaction Mock (1/4)
2017 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/27): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2017 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/29): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2017 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/27) /Combo (5/7) /Goals (4/22) /Not Mock (4/21) /Emmitt Mock (4/16) /Backward Mock (4/9) /Celebrity Mock (4/7) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/7) /Overreaction Mock (1/2)
2018 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/26): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2018 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2018 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/26) /Combo (5/6) /Goals (4/21) /Not Mock (4/20) /Emmitt Mock (4/15) /Trades Mock (4/13) /Backward Mock (4/8) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Reader Mock /Free Agent Mock (3/11) /Senior Bowl (1/27)
2019 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/25): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2019 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/27): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2019 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/25) /Combo (5/5) /Goals (4/20) /Not Mock (4/18) /Witten Mock (4/14) /Trades Mock (4/12) /Emmitt Mock (4/7) /Backward Mock (4/5) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/10) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/26) /Video Mock (1/8) /Overreaction Mock (12/31)
2020 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/23): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2020 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/25): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2020 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/23) /Combo (5/3) /Goals (4/18) /Emmitt Mock (4/12) /Trades Mock (4/8) /Backward Mock (4/5) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Free Agent Mock (3/16) /Corey Long (3/13) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/27) /Overreaction Mock (12/30)
2021 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/29): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2021 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 5/1): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2021 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (5/17) /Goals (4/23) /Backward Mock (4/18) /Emmitt Mock (4/11) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Senior Bowl Mock (1/30) /Overreaction Mock (1/4)
2022 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/28): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2022 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/30): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2022 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/28) /Goals (4/22) /Backward Mock (4/20) /Emmitt Mock (4/15) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Senior Bowl Mock (2/5) /Overreaction Mock (1/10)
2023 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/27): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6 /Round 7
2023 NFL Mock Re-Draft (UPDATED 4/29): Walt Round 4 /Walt Round 5 /Charlie Round 4 /Charlie Round 5 /Walt Round 2 /Walt Round 3 /Charlie Round 2 /Charlie Round 3
Other 2023 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/27) /Backward Mock (4/19) /April Fools Mock (4/1) /Senior Bowl Mock (2/4) /Overreaction Mock (1/9)
2024 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 4/25): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2 /Round 3 /Round 4 /Round 5 /Round 6
Other 2024 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (4/25) /April Fools Mock (3/31)
2025 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 10/2): Round 1 /Picks 17-32 /Round 2
Other 2025 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (10/4)
2026 NFL Mock Draft (UPDATED 7/24): Round 1 /Picks 17-32
Other 2026 Mock Drafts: Charlie Campbell (7/17)
2018 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2017 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2016 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2015 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2014 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2013 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2012 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2011 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2010 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2009 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2008 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2007 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2006 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2005 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2004 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2003 NFL Draft Re-Mock / 2002 NFL Draft Re-Mock