Live 2013 NFL Draft Blog

My Thoughts on the 2013 NFL Draft – Live on Draft Day!

What is this? I’ll be posting my thoughts on the 2013 NFL Draft here. That will include everything from the actual picks, to the ESPN personalities, to the commercials, etc. Anything goes. This page will be updated every five minutes or so, so I hope you join me for the 2013 NFL Draft!

By the way, I’ll be posting live 2013 NFL Draft Grades for individual picks. Overall 2013 NFL Draft Grades will be up on Monday morning. Follow me @walterfootball for updates.

Also, you can discuss the 2013 NFL Draft in the soon-to-be-posted Live In-Draft Thread on the forums, or post a comment below.

6:24: I’m starting this live blog just as ESPN is giving us NBA analysis. Gotta love the Worldwide Leader.

6:27: Some quick updates before I get to my 10 key storylines for tonight. I posted my final 2013 NFL Mock Draft a bit earlier. Charlie’s mock was posted as well.

Also I’ve posted 2013 NFL Draft Grades for the Chiefs and Jaguars with three separate grades for Jacksonville in the Luke Joeckel, Dion Jordan and Ezekiel Ansah scenarios.

6:32: Now it’s the time you’ve all been waiting for. My top 10 storylines for the 2013 NFL Draft…

1. I’m prepared to get only one pick correct in my 2013 NFL Mock Draft. Seriously. I’ve spent the entire year preparing for this very day. I’ve created 55 versions of my mock. Yet, crazy trades and dumb general managers are going to sabotage it. As the lovely and beautiful Awesome Girl Who Loves Football put it last night when I was stressing out about this, “That sucks you have to decide whether or not the Jags will do something dumb because they’re just such a stupid team.”

2. Jason La Canfora announced that he will spoil all of the 2013 NFL Draft selections on Twitter. In about eight months, La Canfora also plans on breaking into everyone’s house and stealing their Christmas presents.

3. Some team will draft Luke Joeckel. Hopefully, that very same team will draft Micah Hyde on Day 3. That means they’ll have Joeckel and Hyde. Get it? Joeckel and Hyde.

4. Look for Manti Te’o to announce that he’s dating someone new. My sources indicate that his new love interest is Mel Kiper.

5. Look for Manti Te’o to announce that Mel Kiper died in a car accident shortly afterward.

6. Look for Manti Te’o to announce that Mel Kiper is not real.

7. As heard on NFL Network: “WHERE WWIILLLL LEOONN SANDDLELEELECASTLE BEE DRRAFFFTTEED OOMG OMG OMG OMG OGM OGMMMGMGGG!!!”

Ugh. As Chris Burke from Sports Illustrated tweeted: “I hope on next week’s “Game of Thrones”, Khaleesi uses her dragons to destroy Leon Sandcastle.”

8. The Ryan Mallett trade talks have died, but if they rekindle, look for Michael Lombardi to pull the friend card with Bill Belichick. New England wants a second-rounder for Mallett, which is something the Browns do not have. I can almost hear Lombardi: “But Bill, we don’t have a 2nd-round pick! Come on, I thought we were friends!”

OK, fine, that’s a recycled joke from Twitter @walterfootball, but I needed an extra point to round out my list of 10.

9. Albert Breer voted Jose Cheeseborough as the best name in this draft. Now, as a fat man, Jose Cheeseborough’s name excites me very much – just imagine if his middle name were “Bacon” – but Breer clearly didn’t read my 2013 NFL Mock Draft. As I pointed out, Central Florida’s Jose Jose’s middle name might be Jose, which means that you could tell him, “No way Jose, Jose Jose Jose.”

10. As mentioned there will be tons of crazy trades. This entire draft will be nuts in general. Just look at what was happening on Twitter a couple of hours ago:

6:55: The problem with what Adam Schefter is saying about high-priced tackles is that the Jaguars would be using Luke Joeckel at right tackle, so it would be stupid of them to take him at No. 2. One league contact of ours called Jacksonville’s decision to potentially take Joeckel “foolish.”

6:58: I’ll probably be offending people by saying this about ESPN’s NASCAR commercial, but I don’t care – how the hell does anyone watch NASCAR? It’s just cars driving fast and making left turns. Like, why not just bring a lawn chair by the highway and watch cars drive by? I feel like that’s the same exact thing.

6:59: As a degenerate gambler, I’m looking at some betting props. “Running backs taken round 1 under 1/2” is +180 on 5Dimes.com. That looks pretty enticing. I don’t know what to make of these player props though. Like does “Tavon Austin draft position over 13 1/2” means that he’ll be taken earlier than 13 or at a higher draft pick number than 13? And by higher draft pick number, I mean a number that is mathametically greater than 13; not a number that is less. And what I mean by that is… never mind.

7:05: While there are stupid baseball highlights going on, here are some legendary – wait for it – dary posts from the past few draft blogs:

1. Mike Tirico just said Brady Quinn is showing poise in the Green Room. What’s Quinn supposed to do, pull out a knife, start randomly stabbing people and paint his face blue? He’d slip to the second round if he did that. (2007 Post)

2. Apparently, the Seahawks just signed someone named “Wilson Tatufa.” This is being reported by Keyshawn Johnson. (2008 Post)

3. “I’ve had a lot of crossroads in my career.” — Cam Newton. Umm, what? What career, your one year at Auburn in which you made $180,000? Yeah, life must be tough. (2012 Post)

4. With the No. 54 pick, the Tennessee Titans select Jason Jones, DE, Michigan State.

Dear Vince Young,

We hate you. We will never give you a good receiver. We will surround you with crap like Justin McCareins and Eric Moulds. We want you to fail. We will salt your wounds and burn your lands. Death to the Philistines!

Sincerely,

Titans Front Office (2008 Post)

5. 1. Starting at the top, are we completely sure Andrew Luck will be the first pick? Sure, the Colts have announced it, but are we really sure? Think about this for a second – Robert Griffin has more than 144,000 Twitter followers. Luck, to my knowledge, isn’t even on Twitter. Colts’ owner Jim Irsay will want a quarterback to tweet with. For example, this is a common exchange he’ll have with Griffin:

@jimirsay: Hey @RGIII what are you doing right now!?!?!?

@RGIII: @jimirsay Eating cereal

@jimirsay: @RGIII What cereal are you eating huh HUH huh HUH!?!?!?!?

@RGIII: @jimirsay Fruit Loops

@jimirsay: @RGIII Fruit Loops is No. 5 on my cereal power rankings #CerealIsGood

@RGIII: @jimirsay ok

@jimirsay: Hey @RGIII I might sign Brett Favre lol!!!!!!!!!!1

@RGIII: @jimirsay That would be great. Would love to learn from him.

@jimirsay: @RGIII #MyQuarterbackDoesntUnderstandSarcasm #FML

@RGIII: @jimirsay What?

@jimirsay: Thinking about trading @RGIII for a 4th-round pick j/k!!!!!

@RGIII: @jimirsay Ugh.

On second thought, Griffin wouldn’t really work in Indianapolis. (2013 post)

7:10: Chris Berman is interviewing Roger Goodell. I’ll never forget that glorious moment when the fans booed Goodell during the lockout. Here’s how it went down…

Roger Goodell walks on stage.

Drunk Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roger Goodell: I hear you.

Drunk Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roger Goodell: I hear you.

Drunk Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roger Goodell: I hear you.

Drunk Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

*** Roger Goodell stares awkwardly. ***

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

Roger Goodell: I hear you.

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

*** Roger Goodell stares awkwardly. ***

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

Roger Goodell: I hear you.

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

Roger Goodell: OK, guys…

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

Roger Goodell: OK, guys…

Drunk Crowd: WE WANT FOOTBALL!!!

Roger Goodell: OK, guys…

7:13: On a serious note pertaining to what Roger Goodell is talking about, I’m not sure if any gay players are going to come out anytime soon unless several of them do it together as a group (not that there’s anything wrong with that). The problem is that the stupid media would transform it into a Tim Tebow-like distraction, so the teams wouldn’t like that.

7:15: Jay Glazer is now reporting that D.J. Hayden is going to be the first cornerback off the board. I have Dee Milliner going to the Giants at No. 19 in my mock, so I’ll count this as a correct pick, thanks.

7:17: Chris Mortensen just destroyed the hopes of all Raider fans by stating that Oakland doesn’t have a trade partner at No. 3. There goes the team’s 2013 playoff chances.

7:21: Not sure if you all saw this FlyFrontier commercial, but it had talking animals on airplanes chatting about flying. I hope I haven’t accidentally taken any drugs in the past hour.

7:25: That Mel Kiper impersonation is one of the funniest things I have ever seen in my life.

7:27: I’m disappointed that Kiper didn’t “own it” by laughing it off. We’re so used to him, but if you think about it, Kiper is such an odd character on TV with his vampire hairstyle, sunglasses and rapid talking ability.

7:29: @stevenlourie just tweeted at me: “about draft prop bets. i bet +160 that geno smith would go in the top-10 in feb and then realized under 10 was after top-10.” Still so confused. Why don’t they just write out “1-9” and “10-254?” My theory is that the sportsbooks try to trick people in an attempt to earn more money.

7:33: Speaking of weird hairstyles, when is Jon Gruden going to update his Captain Kangaroo haircut? I’ll pay someone to sneak into his house and buzz his hair off.

7:38: Why is Darius Slay at the draft? No way he goes in the first round. And by just writing that, I’ve guaranteed that Slay will be chosen in the first round.

7:39: By the way, I have not been able to confirm Emmitt Smith’s report in his mock draft that Geno Smith is related to Alex Smith. I had my editor search for a link for days, but he came up with nothing.

7:42: These DirecTV commercials are worse than…

7:44: Just saw that the Bucks are beating the Heat, 30-25. I guess Skip Bayless was right when he said that Tim Tebow was better at basketball than LeBron James.

7:46: Love the NFL Primetime music. Too bad ESPN ruined that show. If you’re wondering about my hatred for ESPN, that’s the primary reason. I used to love NFL Primetime, so I cried for days when they announced that Chris Berman and Tom Jackson wouldn’t be doing it anymore.

7:51: Ten minutes until this thing starts. Twenty minutes until my mock draft is probably completely screwed up by the Jaguars’ inept front office.

7:53: Speaking of the Jaguars’ front office, here’s a look at their war room:

I guess they have the Joeckel pick figured out.

7:55: Gotta love the optimism of Eagles’ fans. My friend and former neighbor Drew just tweeted (@bleedzgreen71): “Another s***ty day lets see how the Eagles add to it.”

7:58: Oh, and in case you’re wondering why I’m watching ESPN over NFL Network: 1) Tradition. 2) NFL Network commercials are so damn repetitive. 3) Leon Sandcastle. It was funny like the first 511 times they featured him.

7:59: Ugh. The site just went down. We have 12 servers running today, and they couldn’t even keep it up. I’ll keep writing offline so I can upload this later.

8:00: Phew. Works again. Nearly had a heart attack. And then I’d be chosen in the first round a few months later like D.J. Hayden.

8:02: Never mind. Not working. OWIRGHIOWHOWH OWIGH IORGHO ERINB RNV OIRWO ERO IREBNERKL NBERO BNIOERB WN!!!!

(That’s Shannon Sharpe speak for, “Ugh, why the f*** does this site always crash on the first day of the draft!? And I’m starving because typing out Jose Cheeseborough’s name made me damn hungry.”)

8:04: Roger Goodell approaching the podium, still getting booed. Chiefs are on the clock.

8:05: Joe Namath: “Neewww yooorrrkk neewwww jjoorrrzzzeey suuuzzzyyy koooollbloorr ii wwaannnn kissss yyeewwww.”

8:07: Ugh, this is really pissing me off that I’m doing this offline. The site ran so well all day, and it just crashed for some reason. This is so frustrating.

8:11: Injured Reserve just texted me: “Are the announcers on crack? KC will not challenge Denver.”

8:15: So the site went back up, but everything was dated back two days. I had to upload a bunch of stuff.

With the No. 1 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select Eric Fisher, OT, Central Michigan

8:19: Dane Brugler of CBS deserves some dap for this. He called Fisher going to the Chiefs like five years ago.

8:20: ESPN going to commercial, but it’s OK because the Jaguars are going to screw up and make a dumb pick anyway.

8:22: The draft is commercial-free for the rest of the hour thanks to Bud Light! So we won’t have our next ad until the fifth pick then. Nice.

8:23: Ah yes, the Jaguars have new uniforms so they’ll be great. Except that they still make stupid draft picks.

With the No. 2 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Jacksonville Jaguars select Luke Joeckel, OT, Texas A&M

8:24: Only the Jaguars would be stupid enough to take a right tackle at No. 2 with so many right tackles available in free agency. God this team sucks.

8:28: It really baffles me how someone like David Caldwell gets a job in the NFL. He started the offseason by saying he wants to build around Blaine Gabbert, and now he takes a right tackle when he could have just signed one? This team is going to be awful for a long time. I feel for Jaguar fans who know how bad of a move this was.

8:29: Speaking of stupid teams, the Raiders better not take D.J. Hayden.

8:30: Saw a bunch of people on Twitter saying that the Joeckel pick was safe. Robert Gallery was considered safe as well. So were Aaron Curry and Glenn Dorsey.

8:32: A text from Awesome Girl Who Loves Football, “Haha Jags…”

8:33: TRADE OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

With the No. 3 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Miami Dolphins select Dion Jordan, OLB, Oregon

8:34: WOW!!! And everyone thought this was going to be Lane Johnson!

8:41: Hilarious that Chris Mortensen said he’s not sure if the Eagles would have taken Dion Jordan when Miami moved up ahead of him.

With the No. 4 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Philadelphia Eagles select Lane Johnson, OT, Oklahoma

8:42: Sweet. Just got my second pick correct. I am awesome.

8:47: Grade for Lane Johnson is up. In typical Philadelphia fashion, Eagle fans will agree with my grade today and then bash me for it tomorrow.

8:48: This pick has to be Ezekiel Ansah, right?

With the No. 5 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Detroit Lions select Ezekiel Ansah, DE, BYU

8:54: I have absolutely no idea what Ziggy Ansah is saying right now. He’s the next Shannon Sharpe.

With the No. 6 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Cleveland Browns select Barkevious Mingo, DE/OLB, LSU

8:55: Damn it, was hoping for Geno Smith for selfish mock draft-related reasons. Stupid Browns.

9:00: Great point by Jon Gruden saying that Barkevious Mingo will stop the read-option. Because there are so many read-option quarterbacks in the AFC North.

9:01: This pick better not be a guard. That would be so ridiculous.

With the No. 7 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Arizona Cardinals select Jonathan Cooper, G, North Carolina

9:02: Guard. Stupid. The Rams are moving up to No. 8 for Tavon Austin most likely.

9:05: Never thought I’d see the day when a guard and a slot receiver were chosen in the top eight of the NFL Draft. The smart teams drafting in the late teens, 20s and 30s have to be laughing right now.

With the No. 8 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the St. Louis Rams select Tavon Austin, WR, West Virginia

9:11: Nice job by the Bills moving down. They’re still going to take a quarterback at No. 16, but at least it’s not as much of a reach.

9:12: Rex Ryan said he had a plan for Tavon Austin. I guess we’ll never know what that is, much like Ryan’s plan for Tim Tebow. I wonder if Ryan has these plans stashed away in a drawer somewhere.

9:13: The Jets have to be bummed out that both Mingo and Austin are off the board. Those were their targets.

9:15: I can’t think of a better pick for the Jets than Star Lotulelei. We’ll see what they do.

9:16: Dee Milliner’s not on the phone, so that’s not a good sign for him.

With the No. 9 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New York Jets select Dee Milliner, CB, Alabama

9:17: So the Jets traded Darrelle Revis for Dee Milliner, essentially. Hmm…

9:24: Tough spot for the Titans. They need to help Jake Locker, but there’s no one there except for guards, and you don’t take guards in the top 10.

With the No. 10 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Tennessee Titans select Chance Warmack, G, Alabama

9:26: Two guards in the top 10! Once again, the smart teams drafting at No. 15 and on have to be laughing at these inept franchises.

With the No. 11 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the San Diego Chargers select D.J. Fluker, OT, Alabama

9:31: My fourth correct pick! I am a master mock drafter!

9:32: These picks are coming in too quickly, by the way. The NFL needs to go back to 15 minutes. I’d actually prefer 20 minutes.

9:36: Conventional wisdom says Sharrif Floyd, but as soon as Mel Kiper said D.J. Hayden, that got me thinking.

With the No. 12 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Oakland Raiders select D.J. Hayden, CB, Houston

9:42: Mel Kiper apparently doesn’t think the Bills will consider a quarterback. Interesting.

9:43: The Jets have to go with Star Lotulelei, right? Or are they going to address another one of the few positions they don’t need?

9:44: I love how the Jets just decided they want to move out at No. 13. Like every single team before them hasn’t been trying to do the same exact thing.

With the No. 13 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New York Jets select Sheldon Richardson, DT, Missouri

9:46: Wow, Sheldon Richardson goes before Sharrif Floyd and Star Lotulelei. Unreal.

9:51: How did Star Lotulelei and Sharrif Floyd both fall to the Panthers?

With the No. 14 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Carolina Panthers select Star Lotulelei, DT, Utah

9:56: And of course the Panthers didn’t take the falling defensive tackle that I had mocked to them. I guess I’m not a master mock drafter after all…

9:57: Come on Saints, take Kenny Vaccaro for me!

With the No. 15 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New Orleans Saints select Kenny Vaccaro, S, Texas

9:59: That Saints fan kid didn’t seem too happy about the Kenny Vaccaro pick. But I’m thrilled.

10:04: Oh. My. God.

With the No. 16 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Buffalo Bills select E.J. Manuel, QB, Florida State

10:05: Forget the Jaguars. The Bills are the laughing stock of the NFL. Unbelievable.

10:11: I just gave out the first Millen grade of the draft. I love it. Meanwhile, a smart team…

With the No. 17 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Pittsburgh Steelers select Jarvis Jones, DE/OLB, Georgia

10:12: Surprise, surprise.

With the No. 18 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the San Francisco 49ers select Eric Reid, S, LSU

10:19: The site is down again. Ugh. Blegh.

10:20: I don’t see how the Giants can take Manti Te’o.

With the No. 19 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New York Giants select Justin Pugh, OT, Syracuse

10:26: Finally caught up with the grades. I had Tyler Eifert here a few updates ago, so I’m pissed I was talked into moving him up early. That’s right – it’s other people’s fault that my mock draft sucks!

With the No. 20 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Chicago Bears select Kyle Long, OT/G, Oregon

10:28: Wow, so much for Tyler Eifert going high. This is nuts.

10:33: The Bengals wanted the two safeties, but they’re off the board.

10:34: Whoa…

With the No. 21 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select Tyler Eifert, TE, Notre Dame

10:35: The Bengals high-fived each other during their own mock draft? Way to be cool, guys.

10:38: Damn it… Atlanta is likely taking Desmond Trufant, whom I had mocked to them in my second-to-last mock draft.

With the No. 22 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Atlanta Falcons select Desmond Trufant, CB, Washington

10:44: Jon Gruden should just quit this job and join Skip Bayless and Stephen The Smith on First Take with his ridiculous Tyrann Mathieu trolling.

10:45: This is cool. Always great to salute the troops. Plus I needed time to catch up.

10:46: Holy crap, I forgot Sharrif Floyd was available.

With the No. 23 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Minnesota Vikings select Sharrif Floyd, DT, Florida

With the No. 24 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Indianapolis Colts select Bjoern Werner, DE/OLB, Florida State

10:55: Ugh, these picks are coming in too quickly.

With the No. 25 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Minnesota Vikings select Xavier Rhodes, CB, Florida State

With the No. 26 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Green Bay Packers select Datone Jones, DE/DT, UCLA

11:01: Nailed it. That one’s for you, Woody Paige.

11:05: Just received word that the Texans are taking DeAndre Hopkins. We were told Justin Hunter would be the pick – but only if Hopkins wasn’t available. We figured he’d be off the board. It sucks to have inside info but not to be able to capitalize on it. Bllleeegghhh.

With the No. 27 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Houston Texans select DeAndre Hopkins, WR, Clemson

11:11: The Broncos can’t make this pick! Their fax machine is broken!

11:13: Awesome Girl Who Loves Football just pointed out the creepy woman in the Open Hearts Collection. Reminds me of the Open Farts Collection.

11:14: Poor Geno. Guess he didn’t realize the Bills were so stupid.

11:15: Come on, Broncos. Give me an eighth correct pick, so I can tell Woody Paige that I nailed it.

With the No. 28 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Denver Broncos select Sylvester Williams, DT, North Carolina

11:16: Damn it. Good pick though.

11:18: Vikings are on the clock. Time for Te’o.

11:23: Just saw a text from Awesome Girl Who Loves Football from earlier regarding Jacksonville’s pick: “I mean not like they have tons of other holes they could fill with that pick or anything… not like they could have filled right tackle in free agency.” She knows what she’s talking about.

11:26: Patriots acquire following picks: No. 52, No. 83, No. 102 and No. 229 from the Vikings. The 29th and 52nd choices are swapped, so the Vikings are essentially giving up third- and fourth-rounders for this choice. They better make it count.

11:28: Awesome job by Joe Andruzzi, but why didn’t he announce the pick?

With the No. 29 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Minnesota Vikings select Cordarrelle Patterson, WR, Tennessee

11:35: I’d think this pick has to be Alec Ogletree. The Rams liked him enough to take him at No. 16 if they couldn’t move anywhere.

11:36: Geno, where are you going? The Ravens could still draft you!

With the No. 30 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the St. Louis Rams select Alec Ogletree, OLB, Georgia

11:37: Had Alec Ogletree 16th in my mock. I’ll count this as a correct pick. Because I say so.

With the No. 31 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Dallas Cowboys select Travis Frederick, G/C, Wisconsin

11:42: Oh, Jerrah…

With the No. 32 pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the Baltimore Ravens select Matt Elam, S, Florida

11:47: I know you all care, so I think this is my ninth correct pick. I think I’ll take it, especially in a crazy draft like this. If I counted incorrectly and got eight picks right, then I will cry myself to sleep.

11:49: My apologies for the site crashing twice and running slowly all evening. We had 12 servers instead of five, yet that didn’t fix the problem. I seriously have to figure out a solution for this.

11:50: And also sorry for not being caught up in this draft blog. I wish the NFL would go back to a 12- or 15-minute format for the picks.

11:51: Geno Smith and Manti Te’o are still available. Smith is not coming back tomorrow and declined to do an interview. That’s disappointing. He should have owned it and showed resolve. He’ll probably go to the Eagles, but maybe his attitude tonight will turn teams off.

11:57: Thanks for reading all of my nonsensical thoughts throughout this crazy night. Or the thoughts I tried to post amid the weirdest first round ever.

All of my 2013 NFL Draft Grades are posted for each pick if you haven’t seen them. I’ll have individual grades for all the picks in the other six rounds Friday and Saturday.

Also, I’ll have a Re-Mock of the second and third rounds posted on the site tomorrow morning.