2025 NFL Picks – Week 14: Eagles at Chargers

The Matchup. Edge: Eagles.

This week on ESPN, we’re going to have awful announcers calling the shots instead the great preseason homers like Kevin Reilly, Ron Wolfley and Don Tollefson, inept ESPN guys Emmitt, Herman Edwards, and aloof people like Jay Cutler. Here’s what it would sound like if some of these dudes (and some special guests) were calling this game:

Erin Andrews: Welcome to the city of Los Angeles, where tonight, the Philadelphia Flyers take on the LA Rams. Guys, I’ve been asked to sub in for Kevin Reilly, who’s being sentenced for his great crime against humanity where he said people who are born as fans from one team can’t identify as fans from another team. But I’m sure he’s fine missing some stupid Eagles game. I’ve been asked to sub in because of my controversial statements from earlier in the week. Guys, I really enjoy being an announcer, but I am sad that I can’t celebrate National Brownie Day with my family, but these are the sacrifices I have to make.

Emmitt: Thanks, Brownie. I has to say that you lookin’ real different than usual because you normally a real fatness guy but now you look like a women with yellow hair. I hear that some guy are trams sectionals where man can change into women and woman can change to couch, so you does a great job of becomining women, and maybe some day you gonna becomed couch.

Erin Andrews: Brownie? Did you just call me Brownie!? Way to rub it in on National Brownie Day! Jay Cutler, do something about this now!

Jay Cutler: Yeah, I’ll take a brownie, thanks.

Tollefson: Erin, you need to get over yourself. Complaining about missing holidays is no bueno when it comes to female slavehood in my manor. If any of my female slaves complains about missing holidays, I feed them to the hounds. Unless it’s National Hounds Day, and then I’ll have that female slave bake the hounds a cake, and then I’ll have another female slave bake that first female slave inside that cake. It’s like cakeception, but the hounds love it!

Erin Andrews: Oh, great, another holiday I get to miss. Thanks for reminding me that I can’t spend National Hounds Day with my family. So rude! Wait, why am I getting texts from some guy named Kelvin Reilly who wants me to put him on video chat? Go away, creep! Father won’t let me talk to boys I don’t work with anyway! Clarissa, my dear friend, let’s go down to you for a special report. Clarissa, let us know what you’re hearing so I can stop talking to these rude guys.

Charissa Thompson: Thanks, Rude Guy. This just in, Jalen Hurts and Randall Cunningham will miss this game because they will be observing National Rude Guy Day. Back to you, Rude Guy.

Erin Andrews: HEY, CLARISSA, IT’S ME, ERIN ANDREWS! WHY DO YOU THINK MY NAME IS RUDE GUY, AND WHY ARE YOU REMINDING ME THAT I CAN’T CEELBRATE NATIONAL RUDE GUYS DAY WITH MY FAMILY!? WHAT’S NEXT, ARE YOU GOING TO BELITTLE ME FOR NOT BEING WITH MY FAMILY FOR NATIONAL SUBSTITUTE ANNOUNCER BELITTLEMENT DAY!?

Mina Kimes: Erin, I can totally understand you yelling about stuff. We usually have a man yelling incoherently, and we consider him a misogynist, but when a woman yells incoherently, she is showing her power in the workplace. I think you would appreciate my great analysis. The guy in charge always dismisses it, but I’ve labeled Geno Smith to be a top-one quarterback this year. He’s so good he could even be a top-zero quarterback. Erin, I’ve been ignored because I’m an Asian female NFL analyst. If I were one of the good ole boys, my great analysis would be taken super seriously.

Erin Andrews: Milo, you’ve just really pissed me off because you’ve now reminded me that I can’t spend time with my family for Asian Female NFL Analyst Day or Geno Smith Appreciation Day. You’re a monster, so guess what? You’re not going to be invited to Father’s homeschool dinner celebration where he’ll serve macaroni and cheese!

Sarah Spain: EX-CA-USE ME! DID YOU JUST UNINVITE AN ASIAN FEMALE NFL ANALYST FROM DINNER!? ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW!? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NEXT, SEND BLACK WOMEN TO THE BACK OF THE BUS!?

Erin Andrews: Screw you, Sarah. Screw you for reminding me that I’m missing out on Banning Asian Female NFL Analysts Day with my family. That’s it – you’re disallowed from viewing my world-famous Nick Foles bobblehead collection! Wait, I don’t have a Nick Foles bobblehead collection … although, I’M GOING TO MISS NICK FOLES BOBBLE HEAD COLLECTION APPRECIATE DAY, WAHHHHH!!!

Charles Davis: Erin, it sounds like you’re becoming one with the Kevin Reilly chair, Erin. Let’s talk about how you’re becoming Kevin Reilly, Erin. You think you have a Nick Foles bobblehead collection, Erin. Let’s talk about how you’re suddenly being homeschooled despite being an adult, Erin. Why not mention the macaroni and cheese dinners, Erin? Let’s transition to the incoherent yelling, Erin. Care to tell us about the misogyny, Erin? And we can also talk about your obsession with something stupid like holidays, Erin. What’s next, Erin? Are you going to rant about “your” Philadelphia Eagles, Erin?

Erin Andrews: DON’T YOU TALK SMACK ABOUT MY PHILADELPHIA EAGLES, OR I’LL MURDER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP AND THEN REGRET ABOUT NOT CELEBRATING MURDERING NFL ANALYSTS IN THEIR SLEEP DAY! We’ll be back right after this!

PHILADELPHIA OFFENSE: The Eagles had a truly pathetic performance in a no-show versus the Bears on Black Friday. A.J. Brown appeared to be the only player displaying any sort of effort on the field, as Jalen Hurts continued to be reluctant to run for some reason. Perhaps this new lethargy is the result of winning the Super Bowl.

Of course, it comes as no surprise that the Eagles are worse on this side of the ball with Lane Johnson, which has been the norm for years. The Eagles already had issues with their run blocking, so it was telling that they couldn’t even run on a Chicago team missing its top three linebackers. The Chargers are worse against the rush than the pass, but I don’t trust Saquon Barkley to do anything on the ground.

Hurts will have to beat the Chargers on his own, which is a big problem for several reasons. I already discussed his reluctance to run. His pass protection has also diminished because of Johnson’s absence. Then, there’s the Chargers’ defense, which is fantastic against the pass because of Khalil Mack and others being able to rush the quarterback.

SAN ANGELES OFFENSE: The Chargers are in even worse shape when it comes to their pass protection. They’re missing both tackles. On top of that, Justin Herbert has a broken finger on his non-throwing hand, and he had to be in shotgun on every play once he returned to the field versus the Raiders.

This seems like a recipe for disaster against the Eagles. Philadelphia has a tremendous pass rush that will fully be able to take advantage of the Chargers’ liabilities on the offensive line. The Raiders could not do this because Maxx Crosby is the only player on the Raiders capable of getting to the quarterback, but the Eagles have numerous players who can do so.

The Chargers were able to score enough to win comfortably against the Raiders, but were able to get a chunk of their yardage via the running game. Perhaps this bodes well for them based on how many rushing yards Philadelphia surrendered to Chicago, but the Eagles are usually much better against the run than what they displayed on Black Friday.

RECAP: It might seem tough to take the Eagles after they humiliated themselves on national TV last week. I’m even having second thoughts about it, but I will be siding with Philadelphia. I hate that Johnson will be out again, but I think the Eagles are the correct play in this game.

As bad as things may seem for the Eagles right now, the Chargers are in even worse shape. Their offensive tackle situation is worse because they’re missing both players at the position, while Herbert is legitimately injured. The Chargers will also be playing in front of a crowd that will heavily support the Eagles, so they will have to go into a silent count.

While I will be on the Eagles, I will not be betting them for a couple of reasons. First of all, Circadian rhythms will prove to be difficult to overcome. West Coast teams are 7-3 against the spread as home underdogs against East Coast teams on Monday night. Second, I am worried that we could see a repeat of the Eagles’ 2023 collapse when they lost almost every game down the stretch. Their performance versus the Bears was alarming, but it may have just been a one-off.

THURSDAY THOUGHTS: Whereas I have mixed feelings on this game, Andy Iskoe made a compelling case for the Chargers in our long livestream:

SATURDAY NOTES: Jalen Carter will miss this game, while Lane Johnson hasn’t practiced yet. This is another argument for the Chargers, but I’m still very torn on this game.

SUNDAY MORNING NOTES: The more I think about it, the more the Chargers look appealing. I may end up betting this game.

SAME-GAME PARLAY: I’m sure we’ll have some live props for this game, but our same-game parlay will be Saquon Barkley under 69.5 rushing yards, Justin Herbert over 19.5 rushing yards, and Oronde Gadsen under 38.5 receiving yards. This $25 parlay pays $149.83 at FanDuel. You can Get $200 in bonus bets from FanDuel by clicking the link.

FINAL THOUGHTS: I still have no strong opinion on this game, but if you want to follow the sharps, you’ll want to side with the Chargers. The sharps have bet the Chargers at +3, +2.5, +2, and now +1.5. The best line for the Eagles now is -1 -108 at Bookmaker. You can Bet on WalterFootball’s favorite sportsbook, Bookmaker by clicking the link.

The Motivation. Edge: None.

No edge found.

The Spread. Edge: Eagles.

WalterFootball.com Calculated Spread: Eagles -6.

Westgate Advance Point Spread: Eagles -2.5.

Computer Model: Chargers -1.

The Vegas. Edge: Eagles.

Equal action.

Percentage of money on Philadelphia: 58% (182,000 bets)

The Trends. Edge: Eagles.

Jalen Hurts is 11-17 ATS as a road favorite.

Opening Line: Eagles -2.5.

Opening Total: 43.

Weather: Dome.