Humor

Jerks of the Week: April 6, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Welcome to Miami, Part 1: The Adventures of Maximillian Cucumber, the VIII I’ve gone to the location of the Super Bowl the past four years, meaning I’ve flown to Houston, Minneapolis and Atlanta. The weather in Houston was rather chilly, especially when I was…

Jerks of the Week: March 30, 2020 Jerks of the Week: April Fools and April Truths VIII: Coronavirus Edition I’ve been promising a seven-part Jerks of the Week series about my trip to Miami, and it’s coming, I promise. The initial posting will be up next week. I would have made it available today, but…

Jerks of the Week: March 23, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Dumb People in the Wuhan Coronavirus Pandemic I discussed what pissed me off most about the Wuhan Coronavirus – besides the actual Wuhan Coronavirus – in last week’s Jerks of the Week entry. My primary focus was on the idiots who panic bought toilet…

Jerks of the Week: March 16, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Wuhan Coronavirus If you were to rank all of the people on Earth most prepared for the Wuhan Coronavirus, I wouldn’t be at the top, but I’d be pretty damn close. I’ll concede that those with bunkers stocked with years’ worth of supplies are…

Jerks of the Week: March 9, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Car Inspections My wife and both my parents have been trying to convince me to buy a new car for quite some time. “Walt, you have an old car,” my mom said when we were out to dinner one night. “Just buy a new…

Jerks of the Week: March 2, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Star Trek Picard Many of you may not know this, but I’m a big Star Trek fan. It all started when I was 12 years old. It was a rainy, Saturday afternoon, and I was hanging out with my best friend Josh in my…

Jerks of the Week: Feb. 24, 2020 Jerk of the Year: Nephtali Diaz Imagine hating someone so much that you constantly obsess with them and post nonsensical things on their Facebook wall. I personally could not do that. I’m someone who is more likely to silently plot revenge for years until my goal is achieved….

Jerks of the Week: Feb. 17, 2020 Jerks of the Week: 2020 Oscars Golden Academy Awards and the Dana Schwartz South Park Tweet I commended Ricky Gervais on his excellent speech in last week’s Jerks of the Week entry where I discussed the Golden Global Awards and the British Royals. As I was breaking down…

Jerks of the Week: Feb. 10, 2020 Jerks of the Week: The Golden Global Awards and the British Royals Some of you might lose respect for me when I say this, but so be it. I don’t want to lie. I watched a movie awards show. Now, let me explain. I did this once. I…

Jerks of the Week: Feb. 3, 2020 Jerks of the Week: Tiny Lifeguard, Cookie Monster Lady, Handsome Men in the Locker Room I hardly go to the gym in the morning. Hell, I’m hardly awake in the morning. The earliest I tend to wake up when it’s not football season is 11:30 a.m., and that’s…