Humor

Jerks of the Week: Oct. 31, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Old Lady Hate, Old Lady Love The title I conjured up for this particular Jerks of the Week entry makes it sound like some sort of porno involving an 80-year-old woman, but I can assure you that there won’t be any nude pictures or…

Jerks of the Week: Oct. 24, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Timeless I think summer will always be my favorite season, but autumn is a close second. Of course, football is back, but there are other reasons to like it as well. The annoying kids in my neighborhood go back to school, so I don’t…

Jerks of the Week: Oct. 17, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: The Vuse Odyssey When I left the house one recent Saturday afternoon, I had one simple request from my fiancee: “Can you pick up a cartridge of Vuse originals on your way back from the gym?” That may not sound difficult to you, and…

Jerks of the Week: Oct. 10, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Seven Years South Park is usually on the money with the points they make, though when I saw one particular episode years ago, I didn’t think much of it at the time. It was the episode where Stan is diagnosed as a cynical a**hole…

Jerks of the Week: Oct. 3, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Tales of the Ailing Foot My foot has been killing me for two weeks. Like, literally killing me – as in waking up in the middle of the night, creeping down to my kitchen, grabbing a knife and stabbing me in the gut repeatedly….

Jerks of the Week: Sept. 26, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Twelve Girls, Five Boys, $55 Million, and the Future Is it just me, or is the news especially depressing to listen to right now? People have always been a**holes, but they’ve apparently taken their a**holeishness to a new level in recent months, with all…

Jerks of the Week: Sept. 19, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Dead Man in My Pool There was a dead man floating in my parents’ swimming pool during my engagement party. Holy s**t! Is he really dead!? I heard someone shout from behind me. He really was dead. I didn’t know what the hell I…

Jerks of the Week: Sept. 12, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Tale of the Three Foreigners I’ve mentioned this before, but I have caches of Jerks of the Week material stored in my Microsoft Word files. They’re available for emergency – just in case there’s an unlikely event in which I don’t encounter any jerks…

Jerks of the Week: Sept. 5, 2016 JERK OF THE YEAR: Colin Kaepernick It’s now September, meaning I had just four more months left to find the Jerk of the Year. Fortunately, the Jerk of the Year for 2016 fell into my lap when Colin Kaepernick refused to stand up during the national anthem and…

Jerks of the Week: Aug. 29, 2016 JERK OF THE WEEK: Jerks of Ocean City, Maryland. Part 2 This is the second part of my Ocean City, Maryland series. Go here for Jerks of Ocean City, Maryland: Part 1. My fiancee and I spent two full days in Ocean City, Md., and I’d have to…