@cplach Hargrave can play both DE and NT, and we also picked up Mathews from the Chargers. Both are vast improvements over Cam Thomas and Cliff Geathers. As for RB I agree that we're going to need some depth there, maybe rounds 3-5.
2009 Fantasy Football Draft: Traditional Fantasy Mock Draft
Sept. 2, 2009.
This is a real traditional Fantasy Football Draft I participated in on Sunday, Aug. 30.
This league starts two running backs and three receivers. Passing touchdowns are six points each.
I've been in this league for a long time. I lost in the championship in 2006 and 2007, but went out in the semi-finals last year after earning a first-round bye. Click here for this league's 2008 Fantasy Football Draft.
Also, be sure to check out my other 2009 Fantasy Football articles, which will include rankings, sleepers, busts, cheat sheets and other things.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Adrian Peterson RB
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Matt Forte RB
(3) Mad Dawgs - Maurice Jones-Drew RB
(4) The Prodigy - Michael Turner RB
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Steven Jackson RB
(6) The Plague - LaDainian Tomlinson RB
(7) The Champ Is Here - DeAngelo Williams RB
(8) Rice Riders - Larry Fitzgerald WR
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Chris Johnson RB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Randy Moss WR
(11) WalterFootball.com - Steve Slaton RB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Brandon Jacobs RB
LEAGUE BACKGROUND: I've been in this league since 2002 or 2003, and I've had great success during the regular season, but have fallen short in the playoffs the past three years. Despite securing first-round byes, 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation and I both lost in the semi-finals in 2008. The Champ Is Here was victorious, thanks to DeAngelo Williams. Note whom he took in the first round.
I wanted this draft to start Sunday afternoon, but scheduling difficulties pushed it back to 6 p.m. My friend Mad Dawgs was in Houston, so I had to draft for him using his cheat sheets and draft guide. So, I had to worry about drafting my picks and his team, typing down every selection for this write-up, watching the Broncos-Bears game at 8, and participating in the Live In-Game Thread we had going on in the forums. Things got pretty hectic.
MY PICK: Despite the fact that I was going haywire in the final few rounds, things were pretty simple here. I was hoping for either Steve Slaton or Randy Moss to drop to me (we start three receivers). Dallas Devils made my decision a lot easier.
WORST PICK: Unless you're Bo-Bo or Phat Hair Bro, it's pretty difficult to screw up a pick in the first round. There were no bad selections here, but I question Larry Fitzgerald going that high.
Fitzgerald wasn't the No. 1 fantasy receiver on the Cardinals for most of last season, and with Kurt Warner being a huge risk (a 38-year-old coming off hip surgery), I have Fitzgerald as my fourth wideout in my 2009 Fantasy Football Rankings.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Drew Brees QB
(2) WalterFootball.com - Andre Johnson WR
(3) DALLAS Devils - Greg Jennings WR
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Frank Gore RB
(5) Rice Riders - Calvin Johnson WR
(6) The Champ Is Here - Brian Westbrook RB
(7) The Plague - Tom Brady QB
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Clinton Portis RB
(9) The Prodigy - Marion Barber RB
(10) Mad Dawgs - Steve Smith WR
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Peyton Manning QB
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Reggie Wayne WR
MY PICK: I took Andre Johnson with Pick 2.03 in this league last year, so Pick 2.02 seemed reasonable. More on this in a bit.
BEST PICK: In a league where passing touchdowns count for six points, the Plague got a steal with Tom Brady at 2.07. I also like Clinton Portis going at 2.08; I still have no idea why he's going so late in so many leagues.
WORST PICK: I didn't realize it at the time, but my Andre Johnson selection was the worst one of this round. I drafted Steve Slaton, so with a Texans running back, I should have took Calvin Johnson because having my RB1 and WR1 on the same team puts me at risk. I don't know why I didn't realize I was drafting two Texans back-to-back at the time.
Actually, I have an idea. I ate a meatball and cheese sandwich before the draft, so I was probably in a food coma. That has to be it. A league member probably could have offered me a kicker and a lemon Jolly Rancher for Slaton, and I most likely would have taken the deal. Actually, now that I think about it, I'd probably do that swap right now.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Chad Ochocinco WR
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Marques Colston WR
(3) Mad Dawgs - Roddy White WR
(4) The Prodigy - Philip Rivers QB
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Anquan Boldin WR
(6) The Plague - Kevin Smith RB
(7) The Champ Is Here - Wes Welker WR
(8) Rice Riders - Ronnie Brown RB
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Aaron Rodgers QB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Kurt Warner QB
(11) WalterFootball.com - Knowshon Moreno RB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - T.J. Houshmandzadeh WR
MY PICK: I was really hoping that Kevin Smith or Aaron Rodgers would fall to me. If both did, I would have taken Smith and then waited for Rodgers at 4.02 because Landsdale already had a quarterback. If it was just Smith, I would have drafted him and taken Knowshon Moreno in Round 4. If it was just Rodgers, I would have picked Moreno and then Rodgers. Confused? Now imagine going through that thought process while in a food coma.
Having neither there pissed me off. I took Moreno, which drew mixed reactions. 7-Elevener$ told me it was a good pick, while one guy across the room looked at me as if I were insane and asked, "Really? Are you serious?" Thanks for reading my site.
I wish I could have waited for Moreno, but he wouldn't have made it back to me in Round 5. Actually, I was more scared of Landsdale because he stole Calvin Johnson from me last year when I decided to take Thomas Jones and hope Megatron would be there atop Round 4. I wasn't taking the risk again.
BEST PICK: Congratulations, The Plague and Drew Rosenhaus - you've debacled my fantasy draft.
WORST PICK: Once again, Kurt Warner is a 38-year-old coming off hip surgery. If Warner weren't in NFL shape, he'd have trouble getting out of a chair. Even if you like him, Round 3 is too early.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Pierre Thomas RB
(2) WalterFootball.com - Ryan Grant RB
(3) DALLAS Devils - Thomas Jones RB
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Jason Witten TE
(5) Rice Riders - Marshawn Lynch RB
(6) The Champ Is Here - Braylon Edwards WR
(7) The Plague - Dwayne Bowe WR
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Terrell Owens WR
(9) The Prodigy - Tony Gonzalez TE
(10) Mad Dawgs - Darren McFadden RB
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - DeSean Jackson WR
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Cedric Benson RB
MY PICK: I love Ryan Grant, Aaron Rodgers, and everyone in Green Bay's offense this year. I was shocked Grant was available at 4.02 - makes not getting Rodgers or Kevin Smith hurt a bit less.
BEST PICK: I'll pat myself on the back with the Grant pick. Lansdale also made a nice move by taking Pierre Thomas atop the fourth round.
WORST PICK: I hate to bash Dallas Devils twice in four picks because he's one of the few non-Eagles fans in this league (I dislike the Eagles now because they signed QB Dog Killer.)
However... Thomas Jones? In Round 4? Jones is old, sluggish and slow. Leon Washington, who is far more talented than Jones, has been getting a ton of work this preseason and will get a lot of touches. Marshall Faulk even compared Washington to Barry Sanders. Faulk was later carted off to a mental hospital, but the fact remains that Washington is the superior back and will steal carries.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Ray Rice RB
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Joseph Addai RB
(3) Mad Dawgs - Donovan McNabb QB
(4) The Prodigy - Roy Williams WR
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Tony Romo QB
(6) The Plague - Chris Wells RB
(7) The Champ Is Here - Ben Roethlisberger QB
(8) Rice Riders - Antonio Gates TE
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Vincent Jackson WR
(10) DALLAS Devils - Dallas Clark TE
(11) WalterFootball.com - Anthony Gonzalez WR
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Brandon Marshall WR
MY PICK: I really don't remember taking Anthony Gonzalez. That meatball and cheese sandwich must have really gotten to me.
BEST PICK: 7-Eleveners always posts one of the better teams in this league, and you can see why with this selection (Ray Rice) and even the one beforehand (Cedric Benson). Both players will have big years, especially the former.
WORST PICK: I don't like Brandon Marshall because he may not even play, but at least he provides upside for Lansdale. One selection I really dislike is Ben Roethlisberger. The defending champion made the pick, so I can't criticize it too much, but Big Ben would have been available at 6.06. Unless The Champ Is Here had inside information, stole another league member's cheat sheet, or can read minds, he should have waited.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Willie Parker RB
(2) WalterFootball.com - Santonio Holmes WR
(3) DALLAS Devils - Steelers Defense
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Antonio Bryant WR
(5) Rice Riders - Eddie Royal WR
(6) The Champ Is Here - Larry Johnson RB
(7) The Plague - Lee Evans WR
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Owen Daniels TE
(9) The Prodigy - Giants Defense
(10) Mad Dawgs - Santana Moss WR
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Reggie Bush RB
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Greg Olsen TE
MY PICK: It was a close call between San Antonio Holmes and Antonio Bryant. I went with the former because I have Bryant in a few other leagues and wanted to diversify.
BEST PICK: Antonio Bryant, Eddie Royal and Santana Moss were all good choices here. Wide receivers were flying off the board quickly, so the guys who opted for tight ends and defenses will have a pretty thin roster.
WORST PICK: I'd like to bash Lansdale for taking the always-injured Willie Parker, but two guys apparently thought that this was the opportune time to obtain a defense. Just looking at those selections right now is making me feel like I'm back in my food coma.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Carson Palmer QB
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Ravens Defense
(3) Mad Dawgs - Derrick Ward RB
(4) The Prodigy - Bernard Berrian WR
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Donald Brown RB
(6) The Plague - Chris Cooley TE
(7) The Champ Is Here - Lance Moore WR
(8) Rice Riders - Jonathan Stewart RB
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Kevin Walter WR
(10) DALLAS Devils - LenDale White RB
(11) WalterFootball.com - Ahmad Bradshaw RB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Kellen Winslow Jr. TE
MY PICK: I missed out on Aaron Rodgers back in Round 3, and seeing as how this league awards six points for passing touchdowns, I needed a quarterback. But because Lansdale already had one, I figured I could wait until 8.02.
Ahmad Bradshaw was the second pick of mine that drew mixed reactions. Some league members congratulated me on landing a steal. Others looked around nervously and asked, "Who?"
BEST PICK: 7-Elevener$ angered me a bit when he took Carson Palmer. I was hoping he'd fall to me.
WORST PICK: Once again, I hate the defensive pick. However, 5th Street hosts the draft every year, so I don't want to bash this selection because I may not be invited back to his house. Instead, I'll link you to an article of mine that advises you when to draft your fantasy defense.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Jerricho Cotchery WR
(2) WalterFootball.com - Matt Schaub QB
(3) DALLAS Devils - Derrick Mason WR
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Vikings Defense
(5) Rice Riders - Jay Cutler QB
(6) The Champ Is Here - Donald Driver WR
(7) The Plague - Josh Morgan WR
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Hines Ward WR
(9) The Prodigy - Matt Ryan QB
(10) Mad Dawgs - Devin Hester WR
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Chris Henry WR
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Torry Holt WR
MY PICK: Another Texan! As you can imagine, I nearly had a heart attack when Matt Schaub hurt himself after running untouched for a 5-yard gain on Monday night. We get performance bonuses in this league, so I felt as though Schaub was the best quarterback available.
BEST PICK: Hines Ward, Donald Driver and especially Derrick Mason - the three old guys you don't want to own because it's uncool. However, these guys will produce consistently for you each week, just like Rod Smith and Tim Brown used to do in the latter stages of their careers a few years ago.
WORST PICK: That's four defenses taken already, meaning four owners in this league will have shallow depth at running back or receiver. Hey, no complaints here.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Leon Washington RB
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Jeremy Shockey TE
(3) Mad Dawgs - Domenik Hixon WR
(4) The Prodigy - Ted Ginn Jr. WR
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Darren Sproles RB
(6) The Plague - Donnie Avery WR
(7) The Champ Is Here - Jamal Lewis RB
(8) Rice Riders - Percy Harvin WR
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - LeSean McCoy RB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Stephen Gostkowski K
(11) WalterFootball.com - Felix Jones RB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Laveranues Coles WR
MY PICK: I had Fred Jackson ranked slightly higher than Felix Jones, but I have Jackson in a bunch of leagues and I've never owned Jones. Besides, Jones provides more upside and he happens to be my fifth running back. I'm not exactly banking on consistency here.
BEST PICK: If Leon Washington were available, I would have went with him. The guy is awesome. Even the glue-sniffing Marshall Faulk says so.
WORST PICK: Taking a kicker in Round 9 is pretty much saying that you haven't heard of anyone else remaining on the board so you're stalling while you sift through your magazine and find a player who seems appealing.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Earnest Graham RB
(2) WalterFootball.com - Steve Breaston WR
(3) DALLAS Devils - Matt Hasselbeck QB
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Miles Austin WR
(5) Rice Riders - Fred Jackson RB
(6) The Champ Is Here - Visanthe Shiancoe TE
(7) The Plague - Rashard Mendenhall RB
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Tim Hightower RB
(9) The Prodigy - Rob Bironas K
(10) Mad Dawgs - Chargers Defense
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Chester Taylor RB
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Joe Flacco QB
MY PICK: All of the good receivers were gone. My top backup is Steve Breaston. Someone shoot me now.
BEST PICK: I am wacko for Joe Flacco. I was hoping he'd fall back down to me at 11.11. Unfortunately, 7-Eleveners killed that plan and snatched him off the board. 7-Eleveners just obtained one of the top QB2s available; I wouldn't be shocked the slightest bit if Flacco is a top-10 fantasy quarterback this year.
WORST PICK: Another kicker? Are we being awarded 30 points for a made field goal? What's going on here? Are Bo-Bo and Phat Hair Bro secretly in this league?
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Chris Chambers WR
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Jeremy Maclin WR
(3) Mad Dawgs - Zach Miller TE
(4) The Prodigy - Willis McGahee RB
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Eagles Defense
(6) The Plague - Jets Defense
(7) The Champ Is Here - Kevin Curtis WR
(8) Rice Riders - David Garrard QB
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Julius Jones RB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Deion Branch WR
(11) WalterFootball.com - Laurent Robinson WR
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Matt Cassel QB
MY PICK: My No. 5 receiver. I like Laurent Robinson this year; he's being targeted often and he'll be starting in an offense that'll often have to play catch-up.
BEST PICK: A starting tight end in Round 11? Now that's how you draft! Oh, and Mad Dawgs, if you win the league, I'll be expecting some sort of tip for drafting so well for you. A check would be fine. Thanks.
WORST PICK: Nothing too bad here, though I don't like Jeremy Maclin. He can't run pro routes yet and I just can't see him contributing much as a rookie.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Titans Defense
(2) WalterFootball.com - Hakeem Nicks WR
(3) DALLAS Devils - Pierre Garcon WR
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Jamaal Charles RB
(5) Rice Riders - Bears Defense
(6) The Champ Is Here - Brett Favre QB
(7) The Plague - Glen Coffee RB
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Justin Gage WR
(9) The Prodigy - Muhsin Muhammad WR
(10) Mad Dawgs - Fred Taylor RB
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Eli Manning QB
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Packers Defense
MY PICK: My sixth receiver. Hakeem Nicks is worth a shot this late. He's unquestionably the most talented receiver on the Giants. I'm confident he'll be in the starting lineup by October.
BEST PICK: Speaking of upside, Glen Coffee has a ton. He's the real deal, and even if Frank Gore doesn't get hurt, he'll receive some touches in San Francisco's run-heavy offense. I also like the Justin Gage pick.
WORST PICK: Not much to complain about here. However, if I were looking for a Colts receiver not named Reggie Wayne or Anthony Gonzalez, I would have opted for Austin Collie.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Dolphins Defense
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Mason Crosby K
(3) Mad Dawgs - Trent Edwards QB
(4) The Prodigy - Cowboys Defense
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Marc Bulger QB
(6) The Plague - Earl Bennett WR
(7) The Champ Is Here - Colts Defense
(8) Rice Riders - Steve Smith WR
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Robert Meachem WR
(10) DALLAS Devils - Heath Miller TE
(11) WalterFootball.com - Patriots Defense
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Michael Crabtree WR
MY PICK: My starting defense, taken in Round 13, gets to go against the horrid Bills and a rookie quarterback in four of their games.
BEST PICK: Earl Bennett is an excellent late-round sleeper; Jay Cutler has targeted him often this preseason, so there is a ton of upside with this pick.
WORST PICK: The Colts have a defense? This is news to me.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Bobby Engram WR
(2) WalterFootball.com - John Carlson TE
(3) DALLAS Devils - Mike Bell RB
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Chad Pennington QB
(5) Rice Riders - Jerious Norwood RB
(6) The Champ Is Here - Sammy Mooris RB
(7) The Plague - Sidney Rice WR
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Kevin Boss TE
(9) The Prodigy - Donald Lee TE
(10) Mad Dawgs - Chansi Stuckey WR
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Mark Clayton WR
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Nate Burleson WR
MY PICK: My starting tight end. Round 14. John Carlson. You can't beat that.
BEST PICK: This is exactly why you can wait on your starting tight end if you can't get the top four or five guys. After Antonio Gates, Jason Witten, Tony Gonzalez, Dallas Clark and maybe Greg Olsen, tight ends are all the same.
WORST PICK: Speaking of tight ends, The Prodigy took the wrong one. Donald Lee is the blocking tight end for the Packers. The guy you want is Jermichael Finley, who has been a favorite of Aaron Rodgers this preseason.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - James Davis RB
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Isaac Bruce WR
(3) Mad Dawgs - Ricky Williams RB
(4) The Prodigy - Darrius Heyward-Bey WR
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Robbie Gould K
(6) The Plague - Michael Bush RB
(7) The Champ Is Here - Ryan Longwell K
(8) Rice Riders - Nate Kaeding K
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Shonn Greene RB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Edgerrin James RB
(11) WalterFootball.com - Matthew Stafford QB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - David Akers K
MY PICK: I missed out on Carson Palmer, Joe Flacco and Matt Hasselbeck, and I want a backup with upside. Matthew Stafford definitely has that. He has the arm strength and the weapons around him to be an elite fantasy quarterback. Too bad the Lions didn't draft a left tackle to help prevent him from becoming the next Joey Harrington. Whoops.
BEST PICK: I already had too many running backs. If I didn't, I would have taken James Davis rounds ago. He'll be starting for the Browns soon enough. Amazing steal.
WORST PICK: It's all about drafting for upside in the later rounds. Isaac Bruce should be a fine backup for 5th Street, but you know what he's going to do. A younger wideout with more potential would have been better. There will be plenty of Isaac Bruces available on the waiver wire each week.
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Patrick Crayton WR
(2) WalterFootball.com - Louis Murphy WR
(3) DALLAS Devils - Brandon Jackson RB
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Anthony Fasano TE
(5) Rice Riders - Michael Jenkins WR
(6) The Champ Is Here - Brady Quinn QB
(7) The Plague - Shaun Hill QB
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Redskins Defense
(9) The Prodigy - Nick Folk K
(10) Mad Dawgs - Chaz Schilens WR
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Jermichael Finley TE
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Jason Elam K
MY PICK: Judging by how he has looked this preseason, Louis Murphy is far superior to Darrius Heyward-Bey. Unfortunately, Chaz Schilens' return to the lineup could derail my attempt at drafting a 16th-round sleeper.
BEST PICK: As I mentioned before, Jermichael Finley is the Packer tight end you want. Aaron Rodgers has looked toward Finley a lot this preseason, especially in the red zone.
WORST PICK: Brandon Jackson is hurt and will miss some time.
(1) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Brent Celek TE
(2) 5th street love the phoenix - Correll Buckhalter RB
(3) Mad Dawgs - Dustin Keller TE
(4) The Prodigy - Leonard Weaver FB
(5) Cuban Raft Riders - Limas Sweed WR
(6) The Plague - Brandon Pettigrew TE
(7) The Champ Is Here - Panthers Defense
(8) Rice Riders - Vernon Davis TE
(9) Drew Rosenhaus - Le'Ron McClain FB
(10) DALLAS Devils - Devery Henderson WR
(11) WalterFootball.com - Jason Campbell QB
(12) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Greg Camarillo WR
MY PICK: Three quarterbacks? Well, there's no guarantee Matthew Stafford will start. Until that happens, I felt like I needed a capable backup behind the injury-prone Matt Schaub.
BEST PICK: Limas Sweed has a lot of upside. He's a gifted receiver who will put up very good numbers if either Santonio Holmes or Hines Ward suffers an injury.
WORST PICK: Leonard Weaver? Are we getting points for blocks?
(1) Lansdale's 100YD$tunna - Mark Bradley WR
(2) WalterFootball.com - Kris Brown K
(3) DALLAS Devils - Nate Washington WR
(4) Drew Rosenhaus - Neil Rackers K
(5) Rice Riders - Deon Butler WR
(6) The Champ Is Here - Bo Scaife TE
(7) The Plague - Dan Carpenter K
(8) Cuban Raft Riders - Marcedes Lewis TE
(9) The Prodigy - QB Dog Killer QB
(10) Mad Dawgs - Lawrence Tynes K
(11) 5th street love the phoenix - Kenny Britt WR
(12) 7-ELEVENer$ Salvation - Laurence Maroney RB
MY PICK: I've said it a billion times - I wish kickers were abolished from fantasy leagues. The world would be a better place if that happened.
BEST PICK: Tennessee's offense is very conservative, but Kenny Britt is already showing the Titans that he's going to thrive in the NFL. Britt started last weekend and played well. If the Titans find themselves behind more without Albert Haynesworth, Britt could really exceed expectations.
WORST PICK: Don't even get me started.
By the way, I went on NFLShop.com and tried to order a "QB Dog KLR" jersey, but they didn't accept it. It turns out they reject any Eagles No. 7 jersey with the word "dog" in it. So, I tried out "QB DG KLLR" and that passed through.
I thought about ordering it, but then I saw the $99.95 price tag and thought, "Nah, I can order 20 meatball and cheese sandwiches with that money."