NFL Power Rankings

My current NFL Power Rankings.

I’m going to use these rankings as the order for my 2019 NFL Mock Draft during the 2018 draft season. Follow @walterfootball.

I’ve gone from WORST to FIRST, so if you don’t see reverse numbering (via Javascript), don’t worry; the 49ers and Cardinals aren’t my top teams.

Updated: Dec. 25

Arizona Cardinals (3-12) – Previously: 32.
Josh Rosen was feeling down about the latest loss to the Rams, but the coaching staff was able to set up a safe space on the sideline where he got to play with Play-Doh, glitter and glue. This helped immensely, so I’d recommend that all NFL teams establish an area like this near the team’s bench. You need to protect young quarterbacks’ feelings after all because feelings are so very important!

I’m just kidding, by the way. There was no glitter because that would be too messy.

Oakland Raiders (4-11) – Previously: 31.
The Raiders won their Super Bowl over the Steelers, and then they won their farewell party against the Broncos. I don’t see them trying very hard next week.

By the way, why are the Raiders moving? Can’t a city that doesn’t support its team see it move to Las Vegas? The NFL should’ve came out and said, “Whichever team has the lowest-percentage seat attendance this year will move to Las Vegas.”

Cincinnati Bengals (6-9) – Previously: 28.
Hilariously, the Bengals had just one offensive player on the field Sunday with a Madden rating higher than 60. That was Joe Mixon, who didn’t even get a chance to handle a full workload because his team was so far behind.

Miami Dolphins (7-8) – Previously: 27.
To quote great Dolphins reporter Armando Salguero:

“Bye, Ryan Tannehill.”

Jacksonville Jaguars (5-10) – Previously: 30.
The Jaguar radio announcer after the win: “We own the state of Florida!!!”

Sure. Yeah. You own the state of Florida, which produced a grand total of zero playoff teams this year. Good job on the meaningless win that ruined your draft position.

Washington Redskins (7-8) – Previously: 29.
If you’ve gotten out of bed today, congratulations! You’ve put forth more effort than Josh Doctson did in the loss to the Titans. Doctson quit on the route on the final real offensive drive of the game, resulting in Josh Johnson’s interception. Doctson, who has been a colossal bust, ruined Washington’s playoff chances with that one play. Forget just cutting him; the Redskins need to make sure he’s deported.

Carolina Panthers (6-9) – Previously: 21.
I have to say, I have no idea why the Falcons were favored by just three points over a guy named after a brand of beer. I actually would’ve bet the Panthers at +6 to hedge my wager on Atlanta +3 that I took out when I thought there was a chance Cam Newton might miss the game. But because the books held the line at Atlanta -3, I didn’t hedge. Their loss, my gain!

Detroit Lions (5-10) – Previously: 22.
I used to think highly of Jim Bob Cooter, but how many times can you call an inside run on third down? Whether it was third-and-3, or third-and-11, the Lions ran the ball with their scat back in between the tackles. It’s almost like they didn’t want to win. And don’t get me started on LeGarrette Blount. It’s almost as if the Lions want to lose on purp…

Wait a second! Maybe that’s it! Perhaps the Lions want to make sure they have the best draft positioning possible, and feeding Blount is the best way to ensure that.

Denver Broncos (6-9) – Previously: 18.
The Broncos didn’t put forth any effort against the Raiders, but that was a good thing in the long run, as they’ll have a better draft pick as a result.

Vance Joseph has to go though. I imagine John Elway will fire him soon. Or, by the looks of this picture, Elway is plotting something way more neferious…

San Francisco 49ers (4-11) – Previously: 26.
No 49er fan should be upset that Nick Mullens didn’t run for the easy first down on the final drive rather than airing out a horrible Hail Mary. This helped you keep a potential top-three draft pick, so it was a great move. In fact, if Mullens were smart, he may have been thinking that very thing when he launched that helpless pass rather than running to pick up the first down.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-10) – Previously: 24.
I can understand one delay-of-game penalty on a fourth down, but two? On the same drive!?!? Whoever teaches the “Counting Down Backward to Zero” course at Florida State that they have for athletes to get an easy “B” in needs to be replaced because Jameis Winston either wasn’t paying attention or just didn’t show up.

Actually, I lied. I can’t understand one delay-of-game penalty on fourth down. It’s f***ing fourth down. Just snap the damn ball! Winston is the dumbest starting quarterback in the NFL.

Buffalo Bills (5-10) – Previously: 20.
Poor Josh Allen. His receivers dropped six passes against the Patriots. Granted, Allen had a couple of poor interceptions, but from horrible poor offensive line, to the crappy wideouts, he has absolutely no help.

Speaking of Allen, I saw a graphic on NFL Network that said, “Do the Jets, Bills and Cardinals regret passing on Lamar Jackson?”

Uhh… what? The Jets definitely don’t. Maybe the Cardinals do, but as for the Bills, I imagine Allen would play much better in Baltimore, while Jackson would be dealing with the same drop problems and poor blocking in Buffalo.

Atlanta Falcons (6-9) – Previously: 23.
If only the Falcons had Deion Jones all year. They could be like 8-7 right now and on the outside looking in because of their tie-breaker loss with the Eagles.

In all seriousness, I like the Falcons to bounce back next year. They suffered so many injuries this season. They almost have to experience better luck in 2019.

New York Jets (4-11) – Previously: 25.
The Jets just had the best loss of the season. They saw their rookie quarterback battle a legendary Hall of Famer very well, as Sam Darnold sent the game to overtime. They provided lots of excitement and optimism for their fans as far as the 2019 campaign is concerned. And, to top it off, they lost, so they improved their draft positioning. Way to go, Jets!

I think the Jets might be my sleeper team in 2019. It was the Bears this year, of whom I have a 100/1 Super Bowl ticket. If the Jets hire a good coach to replace Todd Bowles, I’m going to bet the Jets to win the Super Bowl if the price is right.

For more…

Underrated NFL Team: See why the Jets are an underrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

New York Giants (5-10) – Previously: 17.
Underrated NFL Team: See why the Giants are an underrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

Green Bay Packers (6-8-1) – Previously: 19.
The Packers had a legendary win over the Jets that people will talk about for decades. Nay, centuries. It’s a great thing that the Packers risked a hobbled Aaron Rodgers’ health and worsened their draft status in the process. Otherwise, people wouldn’t be able to talk about their epic comeback over the Jets at the turn of the next century.

Minnesota Vikings (8-6-1) – Previously: 16.
Overrated NFL Team: See why the Vikings are an overrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

Philadelphia Eagles (8-7) – Previously: 15.
I hope the Eagles reach the playoffs. I’m not even an Eagles fan, but I want to see what would occur if Nick Foles were to have another miraculous Super Bowl championship run. What would happen? The Eagles couldn’t get rid of him, right? And would Foles be a Hall of Famer? Only a handful of quarterbacks have won multiple Super Bowls, and unlike Eli Manning, Foles legitimately defeated Tom Brady in the big game, as opposed to relying on his defensive line to rattle the GOAT.

Cleveland Browns (7-7-1) – Previously: 14.
The Browns are .500! Unreal! Crazy enough, they can finish the year with a winning record if they can win in Baltimore, which could be difficult.

Still, this season has to be considered a success. The Browns won’t be going to the playoffs, but they’ve established the foundation for something special. Then again, they might be 10-5 right now had they fired Hue Jackson sooner. They should’ve beaten the Steelers, Saints and Raiders early in the year, so I imagine all of those games would’ve been wins with better coaching.

Speaking of Jackson, I loved the look Mayfield gave to him while running down the field:

Dallas Cowboys (9-6) – Previously: 13.
Overrated NFL Team: See why the Cowboys are an overrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

Tennessee Titans (9-6) – Previously: 12.
The Titans should consider themselves lucky that they won with Blaine Gabbert. It’s unclear if Marcus Mariota will be able to play next week, but what is clear is that Tennessee will need him. The Colts are stellar versus the run, so Tennessee will need to air the ball out to beat Indianapolis. Asking Gabbert to do that seems like a disaster.

Mariota, by the way, should have a job if he keeps getting hurt in the pros. I’m sure he can star in the Mr. Glass re-make once Samuel L. Jackson retires from that role. The cool thing is that Mariota doesn’t need to act because he knows the Mr. Glass role so well!

Houston Texans (10-5) – Previously: 11.
Overrated NFL Team: See why the Texans are an overrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

Indianapolis Colts (9-6) – Previously: 9.
Wow, it’s unreal that the Colts nearly lost to the Odell Beckham-less Giants. I figured they’d sleepwalk through the game, and I was considering betting the Giants heavily before learning of Beckham’s status, but I still assumed that Indianapolis would win by a touchdown or so. Nearly losing to a terrible team looks bad, but then again, the Titans almost dropped a game to an even worse opponent.

New England Patriots (10-5) – Previously: 7.
Tom Brady just had an awful game, while Rob Gronkowski couldn’t do anything because he forgot his walker at the hotel. The Patriots look like a one-and-done team. If they just had a talented receiver who could stretch the field…

Ah, if only Roger Goodell didn’t run the NFL like a Saudi Arabian dictator.

Pittsburgh Steelers (8-6-1) – Previously: 8.
I’ve been on the Steelers overrated train ever since they clobbered the Panthers on Thursday Night Football several weeks ago. However, it seems as though they’re finally playing well again, so it would almost be a shame if they were kept out of the playoffs.

That said, all hope isn’t lost. The Browns could certainly win in Baltimore, and there’s no way in hell Jeff Driskel is coming into Pittsburgh and winning with John Ross, Alex Erickson and Cody Core as his top receivers, right?

Baltimore Ravens (9-6) – Previously: 10.
Oh, so the Ravens can beat the Chargers on the road by more than nine, but they can’t beat the Buccaneers at home by more than nine? What the f**k, seriously? I know, I know, the Ravens were looking ahead to playing the Chargers, so they weren’t entirely focused, but man, I still can’t get over how frustrating that Tampa game was.

At any rate, I worry about the Ravens. That win over the Chargers looks impressive, but San Angeles was sleepwalking through that game. The Ravens may do the same at home against the Browns next week in what could be an Aurora Snowmo choke-job game of the century.

Seattle Seahawks (9-6) – Previously: 6.
The Seahawks may want to hold on to the fifth seed because a matchup against the Cowboys in the first round sounds appealing. After all, the Buccaneers just dominated Dallas, but only lost because of mistakes.

That said, this might be a mistake. We got a look at the new uniforms that Jerry Jones bought the officials, and they look rather ominous:

Los Angeles Rams (12-3) – Previously: 5.
Overrated NFL Team: See why the Rams are an overrated NFL team in our new Overrated-Underrated page.

Chicago Bears (11-4) – Previously: 4.
The Bears barely scraped by the 49ers, but don’t trivialize that win. First of all, Chicago covered the spread, so it beat expectations. Second, the Bears were missing star safety Eddie Jackson. Third, the 49ers have beaten some good teams recently at home, so the win was more impressive than most think. And fourth, the Bears have had issues as road favorites versus functional teams, so winning at San Francisco was a positive development.

Los Angeles Chargers (11-4) – Previously: 3.
Arrrggghhhh, I removed the Chargers from the overrated-underrated list a week too early. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I’d add the Chargers back on, but I saw stupid stuff on Twitter like “Fraudulent Chargers, as expected.” Uhh… because they lost to a very good team off an emotional win? Do you people not understand how football works?

Kansas City Chiefs (11-4) – Previously: 2.
The Chiefs look like a mess right now, but I think they’ll play much better once the playoffs begin. They’ll likely have Kendall Fuller back from injury, while Eric Berry will be more effective with some games under his belt. Plus, don’t forget that Andy Reid has an impeccable record following a bye, so I expect the Chiefs to thrive in their divisional round matchup.

New Orleans Saints (13-2) – Previously: 1.
Congratulations to the Saints for wrapping up the No. 1 seed. It wasn’t pretty against the Steelers, but their offense slowed down once left tackle Terron Armstead got knocked out of the game … again. The Saints will effectively have two weeks off to get Armstead healthy for the divisional round of the playoffs, so they’ll be ready to roll then.

The MVP race:

1. Drew Brees
2. Patrick Mahomes
3. Philip Rivers
4. Russell Wilson
5. Andrew Luck

And congratulations to Drew Brees for clinching the MVP race. Patrick Mahomes’ defeat to the Seahawks clearly puts him behind Brees, who almost has to win it because he’s never been MVP before.