2017 NBA Mock Draft – Real Version (David Kay’s)
Updated: Thursday, June 22, 2017. Follow me @walterfootball for updates.
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Chicago Bulls: John Collins, PF, Wake Forest, 6-10, Soph. 
There sure are a lot of Collinses in this NBA Draft. John Collins has no relation to Zach Collins, by the way. Or, maybe he does. I don’t know. What I do know is that Zach Collins is an oath-breaker, as he left Gonzaga after one year. I wouldn’t even draft him in the fifth round. -
Milwaukee Bucks: Bam Adebayo, PF, Kentucky, 6-10, Fr. 
I never thought I’d ever be writing about someone named after Barney Rubble’s adopted son, but here we are. These are certainly strange times we’re living in. -
Indiana Pacers: Ike Anigbogu, PF/C, UCLA, 6-10, Fr. 
So, we have characters named after Barney Rubble’s adopted son and skankhunt42, I mean, Gerald Broflovski’s adopted son. As I said, strange times. -
Atlanta Hawks: T.J. Leaf, PF, UCLA, 6-10, Fr.
T.J. Leaf has no relation to Ryan Leaf. Or, maybe he does. I don’t know, but if T.J. begins yelling incoherently at reporters, I don’t think we’ll need a DNA test. -
Portland Trail Blazers: Jarrett Allen, C, Texas, 6-10, Fr. 
I wish Rick Barnes were still coaching Texas so I could make fun of his ineptitude. I miss him. Every year, people thought Texas would go far in the NCAA Tournament, and every year, Texas would lose in the first round. Alas, Barnes is gone, so I have nothing to talk about here. -
Oklahoma City Thunder: Frank Jackson, SG, Duke, 6-3, Fr. 
It’s a little silly that Frank Jackson declared after one year at Duke, but perhaps he’ll be rewarded for his poor decision. -
Brooklyn Nets: D.J. Wilson, F, Michigan, 6-10, Jr. 
The Nets apparently promised D.J. Wilson they’d take him if available. And if you break a promise, that’s seven years of bad luck. -
Toronto Raptors: Justin Jackson, SF, North Carolina, 6-8, Jr. 
Wasn’t Justin Jackson drafted already? What’s going on here? Are there two Justin Jacksons, or is the big board I spent five seconds on screwed up? -
Utah Jazz: Tyler Lydon, PF, Syracuse, 6-10, Soph. 
The Jazz can hope that an upgrade at power forward like Tyler Lydon can help them win one game against the Warriors in next year’s playoff loss. Baby steps for the purple teams in the NBA, apparently. -
Orlando Magic: Terrance Ferguson, SG, USA, 6-7, 1998. 
Terrance Ferguson is one of the few foreign players in this draft, as he’s from a foreign country called USA. Interesting that Ferguson wouldn’t be allowed here if Donald Trump’s travel ban had passed, so I wonder how the Magic will feel about that.
By the way, my buddy Tom is a Magic fan. The last time I hung out with him, a hot nurse spanked me on the a** with a paddle in Las Vegas. Believe it or not, but I have proof of this. It still hurts. -
Portland Trail Blazers: Isaiah Hartenstein, PF, USA, 6-11, 1998.
Another foreigner coming to America for the first time, Isaiah Hartenstein can play power forward and handle Portland’s finances. -
Los Angeles Lakers: Jordan Bell, PF, Oregon, 6-8, Jr. 
I’m just going to roll with David on this one. Actually, David didn’t mock Bell 27th overall. Whoops. Sorry, I’m tired, and I’m feeling depressed about being super old. -
Los Angeles Lakers: Justin Patton, C, Creighton, 7-0, Fr.
Leave it to Adam Silver to give the Lakers three picks in the first round. The lottery is clearly rigged. I didn’t see it until I noticed that the Lakers also had the 28th-overall pick. -
San Antonio Spurs: Kyle Kuzma, PF, Utah, 6-9, Jr. 
Gregg Popovich is losing his mind, if his endless rants are any indication. I can imagine him picking some random player most people haven’t heard of. -
Utah Jazz: Juwan Evans, PG, Oklahoma State, 5-11, Soph.
The Jazz have a billion picks, so maybe they can win two games of the Warriors. Hey, a middling basketball team can only dream, right?
If you’ve made it this far, I don’t know how you did it. But thanks for reading. If you’d like an NBA Mock Draft with actual analysis, check out our real 2017 NBA Mock Draft.
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