Humor

Jerks of the Week for May 9, 2011 JERK OF THE YEAR: Rashard Mendenhall When our awesome troops eliminated Osama bin Laden last Sunday night, the nation rejoiced. If you didn’t watch CNN, FOX News, etc., tens of thousands of drunk and happy people celebrated in the streets of Washington and New York. One individual…

Jerks of the Week for May 2, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Bottom Dollar Food I moved into a new neighborhood back in July. But because I’m always busy working on this site and avoiding the fat women at the gym, I’ve never had the time to walk around my neighborhood. Hell, up…

Jerks of the Week for April 25, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Nerd No. 2 I hate cell phones. No, wait, that’s not entirely accurate. I hate people who are obsessed with cell phones. It seems like I have the same conversation with a different person every single day: Random Person: OMG OMG…

Jerks of the Week for April 18, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Ces’ Party I’ve known my friend Ces ever since I switched my major at Penn State to sports journalism in 2004. We had two classes together and would usually hang out on weekends. He graduated a year before me, but our…

Jerks of the Week for April 11, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Nerd Kids I’ve been going to the gym later than usual. Path to the Draft comes on at 6 on weekdays, so after about a billion annoying in-show tweets (@walterfootball), I head over to work out. I’ve noticed that there are…

Jerks of the Week for March 28, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Hewlett-Packard Hewlett-Packard computers have worked really well for me over the years. I’ve had two laptops (including the one I’m currently using) and a desktop all made by HP, and they’ve held up pretty well despite the fact that I’ve left…

Jerks of the Week for March 21, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Guess What Kid I’m convinced that if I spent an entire day at my gym, I’d be able to write an entire book on all the jerks I’d encounter. Between the communist soccer players, fat women at the pool and douche…

Jerks of the Week for April 5, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: TV Shows I’ve been crying myself to sleep every night knowing that Lost is coming to an end in May. If you’ve been reading my Jerks of the Week entries, you know that I’m not exaggerating. With no more Lost on…

Jerks of the Week for March 7, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: White Afro Lady Last week, I complained that the semi-cute, mustachioed Russian chick at my gym was harassing me to swipe my card even though she knows that I’m a member. Several readers sided with Russian Mustache Chick, citing that the…

Jerks of the Week for Feb. 28, 2011 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Friday Night Out I spend thousands of hours working on this Web site every week, so I don’t get to go out often. It’s fine. I love my job, and I’m fine with the sacrifice I have to make. And besides,…