Humor

Jerks of the Week: Jan. 8, 2018 Jerks of the Week: Pre-Christmas Jerks Knowing that I would gain approximately 5,000 pounds on Christmas – I had three separate Christmas dinners to attend – I knew that I absolutely had to go to the gym as much as possible beforehand. I mentioned previously that my goal…

Jerks of the Week: Jan. 1, 2018 Jerks of the Week: The 12 Things I Hate About Christmas Let me make one thing clear before I begin. I do not hate Christmas. It’s a great holiday. However, it certainly has its flaws, and I am venting here in an attempt to expose them. There are…

Jerks of the Week: Dec. 25, 2017 Jerks of the Week: The Walnut Grove Township Meeting The people who live in my area are, to put it nicely, a bit special. I’ve referenced these people countless times, most recently the woman at Wawa who didn’t have the technology to cross the street, so she had…

Jerks of the Week: Dec. 18, 2017 Jerks of the Week: Hallmark Movies College football TV ratings are high for numerous reasons. People love the sport, people love their alma mater, and people love to lose money betting on teams in which they can only name five players. There’s no doubt that it’s awesome. Another…

Jerks of the Week: Dec. 11, 2017 Jerks of the Week: The Verizon Guy Before I write about a new Jerk of the Week, I must address what I wrote about last week when I made my friend Drew a Jerk of the Week. Drew, who has been aspiring to be a Jerk of the…

Jerks of the Week: Dec. 4, 2017 Jerks of the Week: My Friend Drew, and the Craziest Facebook Conversation Ever When I tell people I make fun of random individuals in Jerks of the Week, many say something like, “I hope I’m not in it!” I laugh and assure them that they’re not, clearly lying…

Jerks of the Week: Nov. 27, 2017 Jerks of the Week: Angry, Old Men, and Sara the Starbucks Scumbag I knew my time at the gym one recent Saturday wasn’t going to be very pleasant based on what happened in the parking lot. I pulled in, business as usual, but had to wait as not…

Jerks of the Week: Nov. 20, 2017 Jerks of the Week: More Jerks at the Card Show The last time I went to the card show at Neshaminy Mall, I was accused of stealing money some guy dropped, despite trying to give the cash back to him. This did not prevent me from going to…

Jerks of the Week: Nov. 13, 2017 Jerks of the Week: Goodbye, AIM I stopped into Wawa to buy milk and a brownie recently. You might be wondering, Why the “and a brownie?” and I would answer, why the f*** not? Brownies are just as essential to life as milk is. I read this online…

Jerks of the Week: Nov. 6, 2017 Jerks of the Week: I Have a Beautiful Figure Again I often call myself fat in these Jerks of the Week entries. I’m not obese, or anything, but I definitely do consider myself overweight. And I’m not alone in this. Several years ago, my uncle called me “fat.”…