2010

Jerks of the Week for Nov. 30, 2009 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Major League Soccer The Bears-Eagles game just finished last Sunday night, so I turned to ESPN to watch The Blitz with Chris Berman and Tom Jackson. Unfortunately, there was some weird sport on where guys ran around a large field, wore…

Jerks of the Week for Feb. 15, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Winter Olympics Let’s get this out of the way. I hate the Olympics, especially the Winter Olympics. If it were up to me, the Winter Olympics would be eliminated forever and replaced with lesbian mud wrestling. Last Monday, I was enjoying…

Jerks of the Week for March 1, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Figure Skating I was talking to Awesome Kelly in Arizona on Saturday night. I asked her when the Olympics would finally be over, and she immediately responded, “F***ing never.” Intrigued that she might be the only female alive who despises the…

Jerks of the Week for Jan. 4, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Parx Casino As many of you on Facebook may know, I was searching for something to do on New Year’s Eve. My Facebook friends promised me a good time in Chicago, Houston, Phoenix and even Australia, but with the NFL season…

Jerks of the Week for Sept. 14, 2009 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Terrelle Pryor If you don’t follow college football and aren’t familiar with Terrelle Pryor, he’s the starting quarterback for Ohio State. Pryor drew some attention two weekends ago when he wore a patch that said “VICK” under his left eye in…

Jerks of the Week for March 15, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Comcast, Phillip and the Fat Flower Lady I’ve been watching countless hours of college basketball to prepare for the 2010 NCAA Tournament. As a degenerate gambler, I’m determined to win money this March. The only time this past week I hadn’t…

Jerks of the Week for June 28, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Geriatrics at the Gym If you’ve been reading Jerks of the Week for a while, you know how unbelievably awesome my gym is. From the lack of hot females, to the old naked guys walking around the locker room with their…

Jerks of the Week for May 3, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Pete Carroll For those of you who don’t know who Pete Carroll is or what he did nine days ago, Carroll is the head coach of the Seattle Seahawks. He used to coach at USC until recently, and there was some…

Jerks of the Week for March 8, 2010 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Women With No Personality I met this girl about a month ago. I thought she was hot, so she fit all of the requisites I have when looking for a woman. I’ve been talking to her on AIM since, and I’m…

Jerks of the Week for Sept. 21, 2009 JERK OF THE WEEK NO. 1: Jimmy Carter and Racism Accusers Credit forum member Wraith for pointing this out to me. I make it an effort to avoid watching political news for a number of reasons (one of which being the fact that there is no unbiased…