Run Defenses, Pass Defense, Pass Protection:
Something new this year - I'm keeping track of precise run defense, pass defense and pass protection rankings in Excel. The benefit to this is that it'll be broken down by week. Here are the download links:
2012 NFL Defensive Rankings Spreadsheet
2012 NFL Defensive Rankings Spreadsheet
- (1999-2003 Excel)
2017 NFL Mock Draft - Feb. 12
2016 NFL Mock Draft - Feb. 11
NFL Free Agents
NFL Picks - Feb. 7
2016 NBA Mock Draft - Feb. 2
Fantasy Football Rankings - Jan. 15
2012 NFL Power Rankings: Week 7 - Bottom 10
32. Jacksonville Jaguars (1-4) - Previously: #31 - Well, at least Blaine Gabbert didn't embarrass himself this past weekend. Speaking of Gabbert, forum member Descendency posted this funny picture regarding Gabbert and Bountygate:
31. Kansas City Chiefs (1-5) - Previously: #27 - So much for Brady Quinn solving Kansas City's problems. Speaking of Quinn, he's featured in this week's episode of the Adventures of Derek Anderson's Magic Flask!
Derek Anderson: Heyyyyzzz guuyyy wiittt haawwttt sissstturr hic! Havvvee drrriiinkk froommm myyy fllasskk hic!
Brady Quinn: Oh boy, I really need a drink. Kansas City fans wanted me as their quarterback for some reason even though I really suck. Now they're going to boo me like Matt Cassel.
Derek Anderson: Yerrrr nooottt gunnnn carreee ifff ppeeoopplee boooo yeeewww ifff urrrr druuunkkk offff mmmy sshiiiiiiieeeeetttt hic!
Matt Cassel: Yeeeaa llisssssten thiisss guuyyy hic! I'mmm noooo lonnggurrr ssuuiiccciddall cuzzz offf hissss shhhiiieeeeeeeet hic!
Brady Quinn: Are you sure, Matt? Does that really work? Will I be immune to all the booing if I'm as drunk as you?
Matt Cassel: Yeeeaaa mannn I cannnnn't eevvveen seeee mmyyyy hhhaaannddssss whoooaaaa.
Derek Anderson: Commmee dddrrraankkk wiittth ussss hic! Annnnn brriinngg yeeerrr hhhawwwtt sisssstteerr toooo hic!
30. Cleveland Browns (1-5) - Previously: #32 - What the hell is up with Trent Richardson? A flank injury? That's obviously fake. I mean, why doesn't Pat Shurmur just give all of his players shady injuries named after military tactics. Maybe Brandon Weeden will miss some time with a blitzkrieg. Greg Little, meanwhile, has been hampered by a blockade.
I really think that Shurmur wanted to get Richardson out of the game because he was going against him in fantasy. I have proof too. Check it out:
F - Fantasy
L - Loss
A - Averted
N - Need
K - Knockout
Shurmur needed Richardson to be knocked out to avert a fantasy loss. See? See!?!?
29. Tennessee Titans (2-4) - Previously: #30 - I can't make fun of the Titans this week, so it's the Adventures of Stupid Vince and Senile Bud! In this week's episode...
Bud Adams: Weh? Where is everyone? We have a home game against the Steelers this week. Why is no one here? Man servant, tell me why no one's here!
Vince Young: Derrr, I tink team play on Tursday night which a couple days ago ha.
Bud Adams: Thursday night? We had a game on Thursday night? Why was I not informed about this?
Vince Young: Derrr, I tink you weres at game. Remember team with T and fire on logo win overtimes.
Bud Adams: We won? We won! Tell Jeff Fisher that I'm giving him a raise for beating those a**hole Steelers.
Vince Young: But I no tink Jeff Fish... Fishman still coach team. He go unretirement and den got hire by Ram.
Bud Adams: Jeff Fisher's gone? We need to trade for him. Quick, man servant, call commissioner Paul Tagliabue and ask him what I need to do to get my coach back.
Vince Young: Derrr, but you have coach. His name Mike Minch or someting like dat. And I never hear of Paul Tag... Taglablue. I tawt commish Roger Goldman ha.
Bud Adams: Who the f*** is Roger Goldman? Stop tricking me, man servant. We have an important game coming up against the Steelers, so I can't be distracted by your usual bulls***. If we don't beat Terry Bradshaw, I'm going to cry.
Vince Young: Derrr, but first alls, game already happeninged and second alls, Terry Bradshine on box with picture and he talk bout footballs.
Bud Adams: It seems as though Terry Bradshaw has fooled you as well, man servant. But have no fear - Jeff Fisher will lead our team to victory today!
28. Oakland Raiders (1-4) - Previously: #28 - I was stupid for not betting on the Raiders against the Falcons. After all, they nearly took what was theirs with fire and blood. Don't believe me? Just look at this picture that e-mailer Shashank S. sent over:
27. Carolina Panthers (1-4) - Previously: #26 - Perhaps Panthers' head coach Commander Adama should bench Cam Newton in favor of either Derek Anderson or Jimmy Clausen. That may seem stupid, but there is at least one person who would think this was a good idea. Someone posted the following on one of my comment boards:
Black quarterbacks are 10-14 and project to finish Week Six as 10-18. Pretty amazing considering the NFL's enforced parity. I would never roster a black quarterback because blacks don't have the mental capacity to play the position at an elite level. Every year, some new "game-changer" is hyped to revolutionize the position, but it never happens.
It's a good thing the Redskins didn't hire this guy as their GM; otherwise, they would have cut Robert Griffin.
26. Indianapolis Colts (2-3) - Previously: #24 - I'm not going to penalize the Colts too much for that loss; they were coming off an emotional victory against the Packers and were obviously flat. They also lost a couple of players to injury, including Cory Redding, whose absence hurt their run defense. Besides, I'm sure they were caught off-guard when Shonn Greene showed that he was actually capable of moving horizontally. I thought that Greene was capable of only moving forward in a straight line, but he proved that he can move side to side. That was very impressive.
25. New York Jets (3-3) - Previously: #29 - A few days ago, my girlfriend pointed out that Mark Sanchez has the worst completion percentage through five games since JaMarcus Russell. That's pathetic. At least Russell had an excuse; he was a fat slob who couldn't stop eating Skittles, even during games.
I wonder how the racist commenter feels about rostering Mexican quarterbacks. Does Sanchez not have the mental capacity to play on an elite level either?
24. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-3) - Previously: #25 - The Michael Koenen blocked punt pick-six was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Click the link if you somehow missed it.
That was definitely an emotional roller coaster for me. As I watched, I laughed hysterically. Ten seconds later, I realized that this happened to the Buccaneers, whom I bet $220 on, and I shrieked, "NO YOU F***ING IDIOTS, YOU'RE LETTING THE CHIEFS BACK INTO THE GAME AND NOW THEY'RE GOING TO COVER AND I'M GOING TO BE SCREWED AND I'M GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE UP AN EXCUSE FOR WHY I DID SO POORLY AGAIN THIS WEEK AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
Fortunately for my sanity, that never happened.
23. Cincinnati Bengals (3-3) - Previously: #23 - You lose to a quarterback who wears adult diapers, and you earn a spot in the bottom 10.
2012 NFL Power Rankings: The Rest:
11. Pittsburgh Steelers (3-3). Previously: #9
12. Arizona Cardinals (4-2). Previously: #10
13. Washington Redskins (3-3). Previously: #19
14. Minnesota Vikings (4-2). Previously: #12
15. Detroit Lions (2-3). Previously: #20
16. Miami Dolphins (3-3). Previously: #17
17. Philadelphia Eagles (3-3). Previously: #14
18. San Diego Chargers (3-3). Previously: #13
19. Dallas Cowboys (2-3). Previously: #16
20. New Orleans Saints (1-4). Previously: #21
21. St. Louis Rams (3-3). Previously: #22
22. Buffalo Bills (3-3). Previously: #23