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Week 4 Wrap-Up

Detroit Lions 37, Chicago Bears 27:
I can't say I was surprised to see Brian Griese start 2-of-6 for nine yards. I've said this 100 times on my site. I never campaigned for Chicago benching Rex Grossman because Griese is even worse. The latter finished with three picks and a pair of fumbles. Sound familiar, Bears fans?

My dad called me before the Bears-Lions game and said, "I was reading the Philadelphia Inquirer, and they said Brian Griese isn't exactly Tom Brady, but he's pretty close." I nearly spat my Cherry Coke all over my laptop. So this is why they had to cut more than 70 jobs in December, huh?

Can I suggest something to Lovie Smith? Start Kyle Orton! Sounds crazy, but he actually didn't make mistakes when he played in 2005. Grossman and Griese throw picks and commit fumbles like madmen. Orton was pretty much error-free.

Atlanta Falcons 26, Houston Texans 16:
It's a shame, but after a surprising 2-0 start, the Texans are back at 2-2 because they lost to the Colts and didn't have Andre Johnson for the desperate Falcons. Luckily, they play the pathetic Dolphins next week.

It turns out Atlanta isn't as bad as everyone thought it was. Think about it for a second... They played tight with the Vikings the first week of the season, in a contest that was 3-0 in the third quarter. The following Sunday, the Falcons were within a touchdown of Jacksonville. Last week, DeAngelo Williams single-handedly destroyed their chances of upsetting Carolina when he committed 302 penalty yards during one drive. I'm not surprised at all that Atlanta beat Houston.

Buffalo Bills 17, New York Jets 14:
When Trent Edwards completed nine of his first 10 passes through the second quarter, I was impressed. Edwards finished 22-of-28, 234 yards, one touchdown and a pick. I know he was playing a soft Jets defense, but Edwards' performance was enough for me to say the Bills can't go with J.P. "Girly-Voice Man" Losman ever again.

The Bills were forced to start their young quarterback. Perhaps the Jets shouldn't wait until their veteran goes down. Chad Pennington had great stats - 32-of-39, 290 yards - but his lacking arm strength makes him extremely limited. Kellen Clemens is the future of the Jets' organization, and at 1-3, maybe it's time they make the change.

I hate to rain on Buffalo's parade, but how can a defense surrender a 14-yard run on a 3rd-and-12? I don't care how many players are hurt, doing something like that is inexcusable for any NFL team.

Cleveland Browns 27, Baltimore Ravens 13:
Derek Anderson? Derek Anderson!? Seriously... Why did the Browns even draft Brady Quinn if they have the next John Elway at quarterback? (In light of the Inquirer calling Brian Griese close to Tom Brady, note that I'm being sarcastic.)

Baltimore's defense sucks, by the way. Two weeks ago, the Ravens permitted rookie Kellen Clemens, making his first start, to come within a dropped pass of tying the game on the road. One is an accident. Last Sunday, old-man Kurt Warner engineered an improbable comeback, saved by a last-second Matt Stover field goal. Two is a trend. This week, Derek Anderson torched them for 27 points. Three is complete fraud and ineptness.

Oakland Raiders 35, Miami Dolphins 17:
I've been repeating that Trent Green sucks. I've droned on that Ronnie Brown can't carry the load on his own. I've pointed out many times that Ted Ginn hasn't done anything despite being drafted ninth overall. Now, I can start saying that Cam Cameron is clueless. No one should be surprised, as Cameron opted to watch porn and other home videos instead of coach Miami's fourth preseason game.

You can always tell which teams are poorly coached by the way they manage their timeouts in the second half. Down 14-7 to the lowly Raiders, who haven't won a road contest in like 39 years, the Dolphins wasted their first stoppage three minutes into the third quarter. The second timeout was used six minutes later.

Any Chiefs fan will be familiar with this sort of play: 3rd-10, T.Green pass short middle to D.Martin to OAK 11 for 6 yards. I'm glad to see Green hasn't renounced his title as the King of Throwing Short on Third Down.

Let's keep trashing the Dolphins. It's just too fun. I know Zach Thomas was out, but there's no excuse for Oakland rushing for 299 rushing yards. In case you missed it, that's 299 rushing yards! I predicted this defense would be bad, but 299? Holy crap.

Dallas Cowboys 35, St. Louis Rams 7:
Here's how pathetic the Rams' defense is in a nutshell. Cowboys center Andre Gurode snapped the ball about 30 miles over Tony Romo's head late in the second quarter. Romo ran backward, attempted to scoop the ball up, bobbled it and finally picked it up 25 yards behind the line of scrimmage. Was he sacked? Did he throw the ball away? Did he commit a desperate turnover? No - he ran for a gain of four yards.

In my previous segment, I talked about how poorly the Dolphins are coached. The Cowboys? The exact opposite. Dallas committed only two penalties against the Rams. I have a feeling Wade Phillips will be celebrating his first playoff victory come January.

Green Bay Packers 23, Minnesota Vikings 16:
Congratulations to Brett Favre, who broke Dan Marino's touchdown record in the first quarter, tossing his 421st score to Greg Jennings. Remember that when Stump the Schwab is pwning some n00b 40 years from now on his show.

Who is Jeff Dugan, and why is he playing any sort of non-blocking role in Minnesota's offense? This is why the Vikings suck. They use no-talents like Dugan, Troy Williamson and Tarvaris Jackson, and it predictably backfires. Dugan was responsible for a fumble during Minnesota's second drive against the Packers. Brett Favre capitalized with his record-breaking 16-yard touchdown pass to Greg Jennings.

I'm sick of NFL officials. The Packers clearly fumbled in the fourth quarter. Chad Greenway of the Vikings scooped up the ball and was in the process of returning it for a touchdown, when the officials blew the play dead. Brad Childress tried to challenge the play, but was denied by Ed Hochuli. First of all, why would a referee blow a questionable call dead? Also, why couldn't the Vikings challenge? This is the second consecutive week Hochuli has denied a challenge on an obvious play. I used to have respect for Hochuli, but maybe he just doesn't understand how the instant-replay system works.

Speaking of Hochuli and his crew, they completely missed an obvious pass interference call on the play that a Kelly Holcomb pass was tipped and picked by the Packers. Again, I'm not sure what happened to Hochuli and the people he works with; the NFL needs to reevaluate all of the games he has officiated this season.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers 20, Carolina Panthers 7:
Prior to the Panthers-Buccaneers game, I was talking to my friend Ryan, who said, "We're finally going to find out if David Carr really sucks, or if Houston's offensive line was just that bad." The verdict? Carr sucks. He really really really really really sucks. Carr finished 19-of-41 for 155 yards, but most of those numbers came during a final, "meaningless" drive. And he also threw a "meaningless" touchdown at the end of the game to ruin my Buccaneers second-half bet. I may be really biased here, but I believe Carr will be out of the league by 2009. He just can't play.

Give a lot of credit to the Buccaneers. Everyone wrote them off. I actually gave them a 9-7 in my season preview, a mark that seems pessimistic right now. Thanks to Jeff Garcia, Tampa Bay is the best team in the NFC South.

Seattle Seahawks 23, San Francisco 49ers 3:
I'm too hurt. Might as well copy-paste what I wrote in my forum: "Alex Smith was injured on his first throw. Knocked out of the game. Niners have no chance with Trent Dilfer, who has 2 fumbles and a pick. Sorry to those who took this for as many units as I did. I hate making excuses, but you can't anticipate a starting QB getting hurt."

Let me just say this... Trent Dilfer sucks as much as David Carr. Maybe even more. I thought he was supposed to be a reliable veteran capable of performing well in the event of an injury. Guess I was way off. Dilfer threw a pair of picks and fumbled twice. He was 12-of-33. Horrible. Of course, it didn't help that the 49ers surrendered six sacks - in the first half!

Arizona Cardinals 21, Pittsburgh Steelers 14:
Why are people talking about the Cardinals having a quarterback controversy? They don't. Matt Leinart starts the game. Kurt Warner comes in relief. Leinart returns later. Warner subs in after a few drives. And so on. Not too conventional, but I think it's brilliant. Perhaps Lovie Smith should think about doing this. If one quarterback is struggling, why not bring in a veteran, while not completely discarding the young guy? It's more difficult for a defense to prepare for two different signal callers instead of one.

The Cardinals should be proud of their 21-14 upset over Pittsburgh. That said, not everything was rosy. Ben Roethlisberger threw a 43-yard touchdown pass to Santonio Holmes on a 3rd-and-26 in the first half. This is something the Cardinals need to change if they want to become a perennial winner. They always seem to find ridiculous ways to get beaten.

Did anyone find it odd that out of all of the Cardinals receivers, Leinart and Warner threw five passes to Jerheme Urban?

Indianapolis Colts 38, Denver Broncos 20:
No surprise that the Colts beat the Broncos. Denver has never defeated Indianapolis when Peyton Manning has played the entire game (the two victories the Broncos have in the past decade occurred when Jim Sorgi played at the end of the season.)

What happened to the Colts' run defense? Everyone praised them after they shut down Reggie Bush and Deuce McAllister on Kick-Off Thursday. The stop unit surrendered 229 rushing yards to the Broncos. Indianapolis needs to fix this if it wants a shot at knocking off New England.

Kansas City Chiefs 30, San Diego Chargers 16:
This just in: Norv Turner is clueless. Despite the fact that LaDainian Tomlinson gained more than 100 yards in the first half against the Chiefs, Turner only gave Tomlinson the ball three times in the third quarter. Seriously, how idiotic, incompetent and inept can you be to ignore your best player?

It's not like Turner had Tom Brady or Peyton Manning under center. He gave Tomlinson three carries and chose to call about a million passes with Philip Rivers, who was 21-of-42, 211 yards, two picks and a fumble. Maybe next time Turner can allow Rivers to throw 60 times. Seriously, where's Marty Ball when you need it?

How can the Chargers save their season? I have a simple, two-step plan I'd like to propose to A.J. Smith:

  1. Fire Norv Turner.
  2. Get on your knees and beg Marty Schottenheimer to come back. It's that simple.


New York Giants 16, Philadelphia Eagles 3:
Osi Umenyiora sacked Donovan McNabb three times and forced one fumble - in the first half. The Eagles undoubtedly missed left tackle William Tra Thomas, as Winston Justice had no prayer against Umenyiora.

At the 11:38 mark of the third quarter, the Eagles had 83 yards in total offense and 85 yards in penalties. I'm not a football coach or anything, but I don't think that's good.

Good job getting rid of Jay Feely in favor of Lawrence Tynes, Jerry Reese. Tynes missed an extra point and a 34-yard field goal. If the Giants want any hope of advancing deep into the playoffs this year, they'll need to find an upgrade over Tynes immediately.

Congratulations to the Eagles, who tied an NFL record for sacks surrendered with 12. Congratulations to Osi Umenyiora, who had six sacks, one short of the late Derrick Thomas' record.


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2008: Live 2008 NFL Draft Blog - April 26
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2007: NFL Draft: Day 1 Review Blog - April 28
Quarterback Rankings - June 25
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Chief Carl Has Lost a Step - Sept. 9
The NFL Cheated the Patriots - Sept. 16
NFL Week 3 Wrap-Up - Sept. 23
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2008 Championship Sunday Diary - Jan. 20
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