32. Buffalo Bills (0-5) - Previously: #32 - I think this grammatically correct NFL.com GameCenter comment is appropriate in describing the Bills (thanks for forum member Sanchez for finding it):
I'm making a YouTube video of Buffalo's front office... but I need help. I personally only own one chimpanzee. Anyone have some I can borrow?
31. Carolina Panthers (0-5) - Previously: #31 - Todd McShay sabotaged Jimmy Clausen's game against the Bears. I swears.
By the way, I have to wonder why the Panthers aren't entertaining the prospect of trading DeAngelo Williams or Jonathan Stewart. Williams is in the final year of contract, so he's just going to walk after the season is over. If Buffalo obtained a third-round pick for the crappy Marshawn Lynch, Carolina could definitely get something better.
If Carolina doesn't deal Williams and only gets a third-round compensatory pick for him in the 2012 NFL Draft, they'll officially be the dumbest franchise in the history of professional sports. Well, except for the team listed above them on this page.
30. Cleveland Browns (1-4) - Previously: #28 - Jake Delhomme is really in mid-season form. That pick-six he threw to Atlanta's defensive end was a thing of beauty. Thanks for helping the Falcons cover the spread, Jake! You were wonderful.
Delhomme was so sharp in his quest to fix that Atlanta game for his son's kidnappers that I'm started to think that another member of his family has been abducted as well. So, after doing some research, I learned that in addition to his son, Jake's twin brother has been taken. Hopefully Delhomme will have more opportunities to start and throw more games so that he can eventually get his son and twin brother back.
29. St. Louis Rams (2-3) - Previously: #23 - The Rams are not 44-6 bad. When Mark Clayton was carted into the locker room on a stretcher in the first quarter, it just really deflated them. And thanks to a fumble in the red zone and a kickoff return for a touchdown, St. Louis simply had no energy for the rest of the game.
The Rams will bounce back, but like I said last week, they were a bit of a fraud at 2-2 because they played the 26th-, 24th-, 13th-, 28th- and now 25th-ranked teams according to these 2010 NFL Power Rankings.
28. Seattle Seahawks (2-2) - Previously: #26 - The Seahawks were on a bye, but they nearly moved into first place by not even playing. A Cardinals upset ruined that.
Call me crazy, but I still think the 49ers have a great chance to win the NFC West. They're three back of the Cardinals, but still play them twice. The Seahawks can't win on the road at all; the Rams just lost Mark Clayton; and poor little Max Hall is going to snap in half one of these weeks. Seriously, I was scared for Hall's life in that Saints game.
27. San Francisco 49ers (0-5) - Previously: #24 - BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! WE WANT CARR!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Sorry, the crowd got really into it last night and I felt left out.
Oh, and by the way, if the 49ers lose to the Raiders next week, Mike Singletary may want to try coaching the entire game with his pants down.
26. Arizona Cardinals (3-2) - Previously: #30 - Sure, the Cardinals avenged their playoff loss against the Saints and are now 1-0 with the awesome Max Hall, but the most exciting part of the Arizona-New Orleans game for the home team was hearing Kurt Warner in the booth as an analyst for Fox. I'd bet that there were at least a thousand Cardinal fans who really thought Warner would run down to the locker room at intermission, throw on a jersey and pads, and quarterback Arizona to victory in the second half.
25. Detroit Lions (1-4) - Previously: #29 - Imagine if Matthew Stafford never would have gotten hurt. This Lions team could be 3-2 right now. Maybe even 4-1.
At any rate, here are more Notes from NFL.com GameCenter:
1. "champ is 1 of the the best coners of all time anyone hoo trash champ is moron"
Pot calling the kettle black much?
2. "THEY DONT SHOW THERE PLAINS"
Indeed. When you're a coach, your No. 1 priority is protecting your plains.
3. "i no they are on paper but whens the last time u watched the texans do u no anything about the besides what u heared on nfl network. u a bit** JUST JUST LIKE YO MAMA.."
Oh no he didn't!
24. Oakland Raiders (2-3) - Previously: #25 - Great win by the Raiders. In honor of this, let's make fun of some of their fans.
Awesome Kelly in Arizona e-mailed me this hilarious picture:
23. Jacksonville Jaguars (3-2) - Previously: #27 - Mike Sims-Walker, who has already been guilty of two games with no catches, said he's been getting bashed on Twitter by frustrated fantasy owners.
"That's the worst part of it," Sims-Walker said. "I've never seen this many bitter people in my life. They're calling me everything in the book."
The haters really struck a nerve when they called Sims-Walker a "poopie head" and a "doo-doo brain."
2010 NFL Power Rankings: The Rest:
11. New England Patriots (3-1). Previously: #9
12. San Diego Chargers (2-3). Previously: #11
13. Washington Redskins (3-2). Previously: #13
14. Minnesota Vikings (1-3). Previously: #15
15. Philadelphia Eagles (3-2). Previously: #14
16. Chicago Bears (4-1). Previously: #18
17. Miami Dolphins (2-2). Previously: #12
18. Tennessee Titans (3-2). Previously: #19
19. Denver Broncos (2-3). Previously: #17
20. Kansas City Chiefs (3-1). Previously: #21
21. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-1). Previously: #22
22. Cincinnati Bengals (2-3). Previously: #20