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Posted April 22, 2009
The Post-Traumatic Harrington Disorder
Dear Lions Fans,
I am very sorry you had to go through the Matt Millen years. I can only imagine the pain.
So many top draft picks spent on the offense, most of which busted.
Among those are: Stockar McDougle, Jeff Backus (bust at left tackle), Joey Harrington, Charles Rogers and Mike Williams.
Every year came hope in Detroit; every year came disappointment.
In my research this offseason, I have discovered a new psychological disorder, which I associate with 99.6 percent of Lions fans who do not want Matt Stafford to be No. 1 overall pick.
I refer to this as Post-Traumatic Harrington Disorder.
Lions fans feel like since so many of their offensive picks busted, then they are doomed when it comes to drafting offensive players, much less a quarterback.
"Build the defense and offensive line before drafting the franchise quarterback."
Lions fans, please go ask Buc fans, Viking fans, Jet fans, Bears fans, etc. how hard it can be to find "the guy."
They all built their team on defense and offensive line, yet they seem to be cursed with inconsistency.
As a Buccaneer fan, I would give ANYTHING for Matt Stafford. You want Gaines Adams and Barrett Ruud? Take them.
Defensive talent always exists in the draft. Elite talents at the quarterback position do not.
Repeat this: Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington.
Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington. Matt Stafford is not Joey Harrington.
Anytime you get those Harrington interception flashbacks; wake up from a nightmare in which the defense gives up 38 points to the Bears at home; or have other scary football thoughts you can't control, please repeat those lines.
In my Draft Lab, I created an antidepressant made specifically for Lion fans called Staffoloft. Recommended daily usage is once a week for the next two years. Suggested ingredients include a heavy dose of Calvin Johnson and offensive line support with the No. 20 overall pick in the 2009 NFL Draft.
Side effects include: Matt Millen hallucinations, 0-16 nightmares, production of paper bags to be used on heads at home games, excessive yelling on Detroit talk radio shows, and panic.
However, if you survive the rookie year, you will be fortunate later on. Calvin Johnson is the best receiver in the NFL, and if he can produce more than 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns with Dan Orlovsky and Daunte Culpepper, imagine what he can do with an elite talent at the quarterback position.
If you build the defense, it will come. It's worth noting that no matter what you do in the 2009 NFL Draft, you will probably not be a playoff team.
Also, there will always be defensive talent in the draft. You can load up on defense in the 2010 free agency period and draft, which means you can be a playoff contender as early as next season.
Staffoloft is for the Lion fans unwilling to accept Matt Stafford at the No. 1 pick. If you still are not buying it, go ask the Houston Texan fans who doubted Mario Williams.
Post-Traumatic Harrington Disorder is just a phase. Over time, symptoms will subside in way of playoff appearances and possible victories.
Then, you will come back and thank this Draftologist.