Disclaimer: These are not real interviews. They are purely satire. They were featured weekly in my NFL Power Rankings.
Walt Coleman had a shady call at the end of the Baltimore-Pittsburgh game. I talked to Coleman about it.
ME: Walt, thanks for joining me. I know your call in the Ravens-Steelers game has been scrutinized by everyone. Thanks for being a man and doing this interview with me.
COLEMAN: "No problem, Walt. Hey, I'm confused. If you're Walt, then who am I?"
ME: Uhh... I'll just ignore that. Let's get to your ruling. Many are opining that there wasn't enough physical evidence that the ball crossed the plane. What would you say to those people?
COLEMAN: "How many hours a week do you work? What is your work week like? Are you a Virgo or a Leo?"
ME: No, Coleman. I'm doing the interview here. I know you don't understand the rules of interviews. When I ask you a question, just answer it as best as you can. So, what would you say to those people?
COLEMAN: "Uhh... No. 79 was not lined up properly. Then he was set. No flag on the play!"
ME: No... that's another call you screwed up. I'm talking about the Santonio Holmes touchdown.
COLEMAN: "The runner broke the first-down barrier! First down, Pittsburgh!"
ME: Umm... no... that's yet another call you botched. Come on, Coleman. Concentrate! Concentrate!!!
COLEMAN: "There were two feet in the end zone with possession of the ball. Touchdown!"
ME: Ah, ha! Yet again, you never mentioned that the ball crossed the plane! Next, you'll probably tell me that you've never heard of ties.
COLEMAN: I have never heard of ties before. Never been part of a tie. Never even knew that was in the rule book. I'd like to see what happens in the Super Bowl if the game ends in a tie.
ME: What? Wait a second... you sound like Donovan McNabb! Holy crap - you're really Donovan who has dressed up as an old official!
@Steeler Fan 3:16 OLB is a need, but it shouldn't be... Dupree looks like he's on his way to join Jarvis Jones in Bustville. I would like them to get a good edge rusher, but i'm not trusting their scouting Department or GM Colbert at this time. Steelers drafting OLB's these days are like the Browns drafting QB's...
@Big Al Sadly, before the Steelers draft an OLB, they need to overhaul the scouting department, because they haven't had anyone good that doesn't wear #92 over the last several years, and that was due to very bad drafting. Might be worth taking an under-hyped mid-rounder there.. as for their #1 pick, i'd like to see what they do with that former Temple guy before using a #1 on another ILB. as for QB, the last vet they brought in was QBDK. There's just not that much out there, so drafting one would make sense, unless we want another year of Landry Jones! ARGH!!!!!!!!